My MIL has ALZ/Dementia and never seems to know how to use her cell phone or find it. I have noticed (since I pay her bills) that there are charges to Pizza Hut in the evenings when no one is there with her? So does she really know what is going on or is this just bits that come back to her? Most times she can't call people because she says she doesn't have their numbers or her phone doesn't work!
You mention your MIL has Alzheimer's, but is alone. So I am thinking that she is very early stages or would not be able to be left alone?
Perhaps she has her priorities set right for her? Because I swear, I am 81, and I will likely know how to get Trader Joe's Old Fashioned Chips and their Licorice a good 6 months after I am gone!
You have some things to check out now; ask Mom if you can look at her phone. I only have a DUMB phone (jitterbug) but smart phones will usually give you a pretty good history.
I am curious! Hope you will update us on this one!
You might want to try to convince her to go into independent living knowing that shortly she will need memory care.
Time is coming upon you. Seek help and speak to her PCP about getting her tested. Soon!
The phone issue is often one of the first obvious signs that there's a cognitive problem. My MIL had problems using her phone and keeping her contacts straight, as did my cousin with ALZ. You may want to transition her to a special phone for people with dementia (one with large pictures and easy auto-dial features, and can also block unknown callers).
You should also thoroughly look through her house to see what else is being neglected: is mail laying around unopened? Is her bank account overdrafted? Is the house dirtier than usual? Does her hygiene seem to be lacking?
Does your Mom take any prescription drugs? If so, I'd be very leary about her admiinistering them to herself if she's having memory issues. I would not even trust asking her if she's taking her meds. Been there, done that with my MIL. She couldn't remember and instead of saying she couldn't remember, she'd just give me an answer but it turned out it wasn't correct.
At this point I would make sure all her sensitive info is protected from her and any predators. You can consider taking her cc and instead giving her a rechargeable debit card so that any loss is controlled and minimal. That is, if you are her PoA and she is cooperative.
If you are her PoA you should now read the doc to see what is required to activate your authority. Often it is 1 or 2 diagnoses of cognitive or memory impairment.
If you or no one is her PoA it is not too late to get this done at an attorney's or by downloading the proper docs at Legalzoom.com or Rocketlawyer.com. It will still need to be notarized and witnessed (in most states). The attorney will determine if she has capacity to create the PoA by privately interviewing her at this appointment. If you wish to help her, being legally able is critical.
She will never again be able to pay bills, prepare food, dress herself, go to the restroom or do anything else on her own.
You need to figure out her Long-term care as soon as possible.
Sometimes, my Mom can remember how to walk and sometimes her legs don't remember how to walk. I know of a guy who could not talk, yet after watching the nurses many times do it, he took a card, waved it against a card reader, and attempted to open the doors to the MC unit.
When I first read your story, I was wondering if someone at the Pizza Hut was illegally using your Mom's credit card number (that happened to me at a Pizza Hut a long time ago).
If you are sure, she is getting pizza for each of the times that it shows up on her bill, then yes, your Mom is capable of ordering pizza for herself. However, it is also possible that someone at the Pizza Hut is using her credit card number illegally.
I'm not sure that your Mom should be living alone. If she needed help, would she know enough how to get help 100% of the time?
Just thoughts...
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