She is 90 years old and I am finding her asleep in her chair more and more or sleeping on the bed during times when she would usually be awake. She does not take any sleeping meds of any kind.
Walking is hard for her, but she used to be able to manage short distances. Now just a walk around the house or some stairs is very hard for her.
Today it took notice with everyone in my family. I found my mother (who is an R.N.) and sister crying together in the kitchen telling me how she does not look good anymore and how she (grandmother) tried to walk around the house but it was too much for her.
It's happening too quickly. She hasn't been like this less than a month ago.
Any insight/opinion is greatly appreciated for me to find a way to maybe put some pep back into her or anything that could help. Thank you.
it could be just a spur of a moments to be awake or sleeping . it could be signs of body slowing down too . check her blood pressure and check her oxygene and see where shes at . take her to doctor to find out whats happening to her ?
Linda, taking her to the doctor this week is something I want to do, but I really do not want my grandmother to hear the doctor say stuff like how she is old and slowing down. I feel that if she gets that in her mind she will die. It's risky.
also you may need to start to prepare yourself for the dreaded day she passes.dont overthink it, talk to her doctor...good luck..hang in there, its hard to watch this..
If she is getting proper nutrition and proper caregiving (which she obviously is) I would be inclined to let her be. Hugs
There are over the counter meds that are also troubling, esp benedryl, the allergy med. That is the part of the pain meds used also for nighttime sleep aide.
Always check for a UTI in this instance of sudden weakness or confusion.
The drug elimination is the one thing you can do that might make a major difference...and obviously it costs NOTHING. Zocor, benedryl, Ditropan, Ativan, Namenda, Zoloft, Seroquel...all are drugs that had major memory and alertness and also psychotic problems for my mother. She is now on...NOTHING.
And your mother is an RN? Ask her if she knows about Beers Criteria. I think I've asked every caregiver I've worked with if they knew about it, and no one has. Amazing. Check BP, blood sugar too...
You are in the unique position of being able to try out a simple nutritional experiment and closely observe the results, if any.
I happen to be the sole caregiver for my 105 yo grandmother. Over the years I have served her plenty of raw vegetable juices via my Champion juicer, and in the last few years, a lot of what I call "Centenarian Soup".
The key idea here is that as we age, all aspects of digestion are less effective. We chew less effectively, produce fewer digestive enzymes, less hydrochloric acid, and do less stomach churning.
So to counter that, we want to provide the most maximally bio-assimilable "Minerals R Us" foods possible without going overboard on cost and labor or bad taste.
Here is an example of my most recent soup - Cream of Broccoli:
small amt of butter and / or extra virgin olive oil to carmelize some onions
then add:
water
broccoli florets and the heart of the stem
half a carrot, sliced
small amount of cabbage
celery
spinach leaves
fresh parsley
seasoned towards the end of the simmering with some combo of pepper, boullion, paprika, chili powder (a touch)
after using the immersion blender, add small amount of sour cream, some potato flakes, and optionally milk
finally, blend again into the smoothest reasonable consistency and serve
This can turn out to be really delicious and much better than all of those V-8 soups. Instead of broccoli, the base might be asparagus, squash, or you name it.
If you are curious, you can google { kronprinz wilhelm famishing } and read about the effects of a poor diet on sailors who were at sea for 255 days. They had plenty of meat and potatos, white flour, butter and biscuits, etc, but no fresh veggies.
A quote: "The subtle, slow-moving influence of their refined and demineralised diet had not yet broken the sturdy Germans. They had no suspicion that the fruits of their raids were actually eating into their lives."
Another: "Alarming conditions began to develop. Typical symptoms of paralysis, dilated heart, atrophy of muscles and pain on pressure over nerves, with anemia, were marked. Fifty of the men could not stand on their feet. They were dropping at the rate of two a day. It seemed that a curse had descended upon the cruiser and it was plain that the whole crew was rapidly going to pieces."
Another: "Americans before the war, as far as they could afford, ate more or less generously of onions, lettuce, asparagus, cabbage, carrots, parsnips, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, celery, apples, berries, oranges, grapes and other base-forming foods, all of which assist Nature to combat or to modify some of the evil effects of the refined diet on which the Germans attempted to thrive for a long period."
So yes, I am comparing our elders to those distraught sailors and wondering if the same remedy might work for us.
In my grandmother's case, it looks like YES!
I was with my grandmother today while she was eating supper making sure she eats well and drinks plenty of fluids. She showed me how her bottom tooth is loose and the gum area looks sore/raw. Besides that all of her teeth look very bad and she has already lost a couple in the past year. I know she does not brush her teeth. It looks like she hasn't done it in a very long time. It almost hurts to look at them.
I am going to make a dentist appointment tomorrow. I just hope they don't suggest dentures. My mother told me how when my grandfather had them it was the beginning of the end for him.
She has been going to the washroom a little more, but she still looks very tired.
I really have to make sure now that she brushes, drinks plenty of fluids and has a strong diet.
Hopefully that and the combination of things to check and give her suggested by all of you wonderful people things will get better for her.
Thank you.
Have you tried using the Colgate Wisp disposable toothbrush? These are very soft and at least accomplish some surface cleaning and result is fresher breath.
I would be hesitant re the stress of a dental visit. Even a cleaning can be stressful.
With Moms dementia I have learned the hard way to keep my fingers away from her mouth.
Of course I have also learned to stay out of striking distance when she is hostile
Last Saturday my grandmother was taken to the emergency by ambulance because she looked more pale than ever before and couldn't sleep well because she said she felt very very sick.
She was placed in a room by herself in the emergency section, but was later placed in a critical care room because they found out she had low blood pressure and an irregular/slow heartbeat.
One doctor suggested a pacemaker. The risks of her getting an infection later or dying on the table was something me and my mom did not want to take a chance on. We really did not know what to do until another doctor suggested a blood transfusion and that he believes her heart was most likely always slow/irregular.
Her problem was that her blood did not contain a normal amount of red blood cells so they gave her a blood transfusion with red cell concentrated blood. She was at the hospital for 4 days with me and my mom taking 10 hour shifts to stay by her side and make sure she was not alone and had someone to talk to and not get too confused or worried to what was happening to her.
Fortunately the blood transfusion improved her blood pressure and heartbeat and she came back home yesterday evening. My family and I have to keep a close eye on her for now since she has trouble walking from laying down on the hospital bed for a long time.
Also she needs to improve her fluid intake. On top of everything she also had a UTI.
So far though she looks more brighter and is not complaining of feeling ill. I go and talk to her once ever hour or two to see if she needs anything or I give her some water or juice in a small cup. We are all taking it step by step with her.
i hate it when my dad gets sick , its heart breaking , he just had uti also and is now takin antibodi for it . was tested again yesterday and its cleared up .
youre a good person and i bet your grandma appreciates you . xoxo .
Good to hear the feedback on Grandma:) Yes, the dreaded UTI. There is an antibiotic called Macrodantin, given daily to prevent UTIs. Really helps!
Can you simply brush her teeth for her? My Mother at 94 has all her own teeth, and we brush and floss her teeth after every meal. Easy to do when they are finished in the bathroom. Just stop at the sink, brush teeth, and her tongue.
YOU are a very good Granddaughter, dear one:) Hugs, Christina xo
That is great news, linda! It made me smile when I read that.
As far as brushing her teeth goes she can do it herself with no issues, but I have to watch over her and make sure she actually does it. So I basically just lead her into the washroom and make sure all goes well before she sleeps. Her gums look a little raw so I have to make sure she doesn't brush too hard.
I can't thank you two and everyone else who posted in this thread enough for the kind words, suggestions and insight. You are all so incredibly wonderful .