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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Tara, it's a first step. Just remember, if it doesn't work, you call the doctor back. Start a notebook with your daily observations of your husband's behaviors:time of day, how you reacted, what times he gets various meds.
Watch some Teepa Snow videos on YouTube when he sleeps so you get an idea of how to handle these various situations as they come up.
Tarajane, Seroquel was our first "miracle" drug. In our case it was used for anxiety and agitation that prevented sleeping through the night. I simply could not have continued in the caregiving role without SLEEP, so this was very important!
If you look it up online you will probably discover that it isn't to be used with elders, with people with dementia, etc. etc. But it IS used in those circumstances, by very responsible doctors who keep careful track of the results. Usually it is started at a very low dose and gradually titrated up to a therapeutic level if there are no side effects. So it may not be effective immediately.
I learned to give it to my husband when he was completely ready for bed and in the bedroom. We had a very short window before he became a zombie! (It is no problem being a zombie if you are fast asleep in bed.) The "zombie" effects wore off in 3 to 4 hours, and it was not a problem if he had to go to the bathroom in the night. The calming effects must have lasted longer, because he was able to sleep thought the night.
Other people in my support group gave Seroquel to their loved ones during the day, and it worked fine for them. Some others tried it but didn't find it helpful at all.
I tell you all this so you'll have some idea of what to expect. You will NOT know if it will work for your husband unless you try it. Maybe it will be your first miracle drug on this journey. Maybe it won't work at all. But unlike something like haldol, it does no permanent damage and side effects will go away when you stop the drug, if that is what happens in your case.
I think I've mentioned before that the situation you are in is first and foremost a MEDICAL problem, and I am so glad to read that the doctor is trying to come up with medical solutions. This might not be perfect solution. But do keep trying!
100% agree with Sunny. At this point, what you are giving him works. Don't adjust the dosage without the doc's input. NOW is the time to secure the guns.
Tarajane, the hospital and now the rehab center has my Mom on seroquel 12.5 mg. It's hard to tell how that med is working because my Mom had serious delirium after a head injury in a fall at home. It does make her much calmer but she seems very zoned out and sleeps a lot.
Type in seroquel into Google, and read what drug website and WebMD has to say about the prescription.
These meds are pretty much trial and error. If seroquel doesn't seem to help, there are other meds the doctor can use in it's place.
Seroquel was very effective for my mom's sundowning behaviors. She started on 12.5 mg once a day and it gradually increased to 75 mg once a day over the course of 3.5 years. Recently with her move to a facility, she is now taking much more of it, but I am not privy to that info. Dysfunctional families that want to believe their delusions rather than listening and believing the truth.
Tarajane, if the lawyer you saw was an Elder Law specialist, he may not be the right person to talk to about divorce and other legal options concerning your marriage. Perhaps he will refer you to a Family Law specialist, or to someone else in the firm who handles such matters.
Tara, what time did you give the Seroquel? My mom's sundowning also started about threeish but did not start to get bad until four or so. I alway gave her Seroquel about 4:30, then fed her dinner, she was very ready for bed, and exhausted between 6 and 6:30, and slept all night wiith up and downs until 8 or so to see where she was.
What time zone are you in? Giving my mom the med about two hours before bedtime worked very well an gave me some respite the end of the day which I needed so badly.
Tara, and just one tip for you. Always keep a dose of Seroquel with you. If I had to have mom at the ER through sundowning it was very difficult for her to say nothing of the staff and me. They would order it from the hospital pharmacy for mom, but that took forever. But they would allow me to give it to mom if I had it with me.
Have you notified 911 that you have a person with dementia, that loves his guns, living there?
Please don't experiment on your own with dosage. You feel you are in good hands with an experienced doctor. Work closely with him!
Most prescribing doctors start at a low dose knowing that it might not be enough, but wanting to see if there are side effects. It is easier to monitor and adjust the dose upward if necessary.
My husband leveled off at 100 mg, and remained at that level for the rest of his life (about 9 years). Don't worry about looking ahead too far. Just monitor it day-to-day. Discuss changes in his symptoms with his doctor.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Watch some Teepa Snow videos on YouTube when he sleeps so you get an idea of how to handle these various situations as they come up.
If you look it up online you will probably discover that it isn't to be used with elders, with people with dementia, etc. etc. But it IS used in those circumstances, by very responsible doctors who keep careful track of the results. Usually it is started at a very low dose and gradually titrated up to a therapeutic level if there are no side effects. So it may not be effective immediately.
I learned to give it to my husband when he was completely ready for bed and in the bedroom. We had a very short window before he became a zombie! (It is no problem being a zombie if you are fast asleep in bed.) The "zombie" effects wore off in 3 to 4 hours, and it was not a problem if he had to go to the bathroom in the night. The calming effects must have lasted longer, because he was able to sleep thought the night.
Other people in my support group gave Seroquel to their loved ones during the day, and it worked fine for them. Some others tried it but didn't find it helpful at all.
I tell you all this so you'll have some idea of what to expect. You will NOT know if it will work for your husband unless you try it. Maybe it will be your first miracle drug on this journey. Maybe it won't work at all. But unlike something like haldol, it does no permanent damage and side effects will go away when you stop the drug, if that is what happens in your case.
I think I've mentioned before that the situation you are in is first and foremost a MEDICAL problem, and I am so glad to read that the doctor is trying to come up with medical solutions. This might not be perfect solution. But do keep trying!
Type in seroquel into Google, and read what drug website and WebMD has to say about the prescription.
These meds are pretty much trial and error. If seroquel doesn't seem to help, there are other meds the doctor can use in it's place.
In comparison, an adult I know who takes it for bipolar disorder takes 800 mg per day.
You can see that when used for treating behaviors in dementia a very small dose is used.
What time zone are you in? Giving my mom the med about two hours before bedtime worked very well an gave me some respite the end of the day which I needed so badly.
Have you notified 911 that you have a person with dementia, that loves his guns, living there?
Most prescribing doctors start at a low dose knowing that it might not be enough, but wanting to see if there are side effects. It is easier to monitor and adjust the dose upward if necessary.
My husband leveled off at 100 mg, and remained at that level for the rest of his life (about 9 years). Don't worry about looking ahead too far. Just monitor it day-to-day. Discuss changes in his symptoms with his doctor.
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