I just started noticing that I am like a mouse scampering around. I'll make myself a cup of coffee in the morning, turn on the computer, then do a lot of other little things. I come back and see my coffee is still there and needs reheating. So I do. Then I sit back down to work, get up to do a lot of little things, and come back to my coffee that needs to be reheated again. It can take me all morning to finish a cup of coffee. And it can take all day to get any real work done. I don't need to be doing all the little things I do. I know it is just working out the agitation I feel.
So I decided I am going to sit here and finish my cup of coffee. The world is not going to burst into flames or the rabbits die of hunger in the next few minutes. I don't really need to go look out the front door, change the garbage liner, check on what my mother is up to now or dust the last shelf on the cabinet. That can wait until after I finish the cup of coffee than I started 2 hours ago. I don't care how dirty the kitchen floor is.
Anyone else feel like a perpetual motion machine that never gets anything done?
Recently, I was diagnosed with A.A.A.D.D.
Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:
I decided to wash my car. As I start toward the garage, I notice that there is mail on the hall table. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys down on the table, put the junk mail in the trashcan under the table, and notice that the trashcan is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the trash first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the trash anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.
I take my chequebook off the table, and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go to my desk where I find the bottle of coke that I had been drinking.
I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. I see that the coke is getting warm, and I decide I should put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.
As I head toward the kitchen with the coke, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye--they need to be watered. I set the coke down on the counter, and I discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning.
I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly I spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, we will be looking for the remote, but nobody will remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers.
I splash some water on the flowers, but most of it spills on the floor.
So, I set the remote back down on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill.
Then I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.
At the end of the day: the car isn't washed, the bills aren't paid, there is a warm bottle of coke sitting on the counter, the flowers aren't watered, there is still only one check in my chequebook, I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.
Then when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day long, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.
People might say I need to cut down on the caffeine, but seeing my first cup of coffee still sitting here after three hours, I don't think caffeine is the problem. I think I do have AAADD from CSD.
I have a bit of OCD and so many things aren't being tended to in my house and in the back of my mind it is driving me nuts... my sig other doesn't understand that trait and just tells me to relax... well those are fighting words, then I grumble that he's not helping enough around the house :(
Stop the world, I want to get off minus my helmet, armor, and blankets for my fort.