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I get over 1 or 2 a wk and am feeling overwhelmed. Family brings food and containers of juice or water, daily which she dearly enjoys. Her dementia keeps her from tossing anything in garbage pails.


Also, she is unable to wash herself. I'm not sure they understand how much care she needs.


I clean 1 rm at a time. Change sheets wash. A caregiver is in the works.

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She needs professional care now. Her cognitive issues seem profound.

Tell family that you’re unable to take care of her and that you’re quitting the job. Then do it. If you’re fond of her, you can continue to be in her life but won’t have responsibility for keeping her safe and clean.
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So you are a friend who is helping your friend? Am I correct?
Yes, it is very important that when this food is delivered you are there to tell them you cannot continue in this care. They may be trying to avoid in facility placement, but clearly this isn't fair to you. Let them know you won't continue to enable this.
I hope you will update us.
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Hmmm,
I am trying to guess what your question means. I’m thinking you need something for the gifts of food and drink to go on so it doesn’t fall off the table? How about a tray? Is it primarily fast food? Could you ask the person who brings the food to throw away the waste from the previous day? Does she want to keep it? Does she have hoarding issues?
‘What is it that you get 1 or 2 a week of? Sorry, I’m having trouble understanding.

I think someone needs to call APS and report the situation so she can have a needs assessment.

You are a wonderful person to help her but this is surely not a one person job. I’m glad a caregiver is in the works but it sounds as if your friend needs 24/7 care.
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Sorry, I don't understand what u mean about the table. Are the bottles and containers falling onto the floor? How about pool noodles. You slice one side and put them over the edge of the table.

I don't think an aide will be enough. She may need 24/7 care. Once she needs to be reminded to bathe and help toileting or becomes incontinent its time for 24/7 care. Caregiver in the works...and how long will that be? Suggest to a family member that they contact APS to have her situation evaluated. Make a list of the things u need to do for her and what she can no longer do for herself. Make it plain that you cannot continue to help her. Its become too overwheming.

And really, her family should be doing for her.
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