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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Sometimes you just wait it out until there is an emergency. She has the right to make her own bad decisions until she has been found incompetent by a court, or is she has had a guardian appointed, or doc's have found her to be incapacitated and powers of attorney invoked that include the responsibility of the POA determining housing.
We have both medical POA, financial POA and documentation from doctor that states she has dementia. Will this be sufficient for getting her to stay at the facility??
I've been through this with an aunt and have talked with others. They say the same thing Gladimhere said - "It usually takes a bad fall or illness."
Social workers will usually try to guilt a family member into moving in with the parent. My relative's Sunday School teacher kept trying to get me to give up my life and go stay with my relative at night, all because she REFUSED to go to AL.
Wish there was an easy answer....they can be so stubborn. My mom (89) recognizes that she can't (or rather she won't) live alone, but right now dad lives with her (which is not the best situation) and she fully expects to stay with one of her children or have live in help should my dad pass first. No and no. I have DPOA and she has been diagnosed with dementia. When the time comes, I will execute this and put her in the best facility I can find. I will have to "lie" to get her there, but for everyone's peace of mind, this is an absolute.
Do you or a sibling have POA? Without this it will be difficult to force the issue. If she is a fall risk (at that age, most are) it will be just a matter of time until a tumble lands her in the ER. At that point family steps in and declares it is no longer safe for her to live on her own. Arrangements will be made from there. Of course the other alternative would be for her to live with you or another family member. You need to think long and hard about this one as your life will be severely uprooted. It is an enormous responsibility and many of us simply are not up to the task. Dementia is very difficult to deal with on a day to day basis.
Best of luck to you as this is not an easy journey. It's nearly impossible to convince our parents to do what is best for them when they are past the point of reasoning.
Abby thank you for responding!!! We have both Medical POA and financial POA. Today we’re taking her to the AL facility to move in. She’s visited the facility several times and refuses to go. It’s so sad, but we’re going to trick her and say we’re going to visit it again, I’ve been reading on line that the POA isn’t sufficient enough that we will need a guardianship through the courts.
Whether you have decision making power for residence, depends on what the POA document says. It may require mom being declared incapacitated by two doctors. In that case there would be no need for guardianship, which can get quite expensive.
Maria04, hope today's move works out well for your mom. Keep in mind, that regardless of how stubborn she might be, she's probably also scared about her future, confused by the present, and wanting to keep her independence. Her life is being upended and, depending on the stage of her Alzheimer's dementia, her coping ability is diminished. It's a tough time for both her and you. If you think it would help for you to spend the rest of the day and night with her to ease her transition, then you should do that whether or not the facility staff thinks it's a good idea -- you know your mom better than they do and doing that worked well when I moved my dad to memory care assisted living. Also, while your mom may not need to be in memory care right now, she probably will in the not too distant future, so start preparing for that next move.
Regarding guardianship, you may or may not have to have that additional court-ordered authority, but know that I found through three experiences with guardianship that it is an option that need not be terribly expensive or onerous and sometimes it is the only way to enable doing what is best for the person who needs your help.
Best wishes for your mom, you and the rest of your family.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Social workers will usually try to guilt a family member into moving in with the parent. My relative's Sunday School teacher kept trying to get me to give up my life and go stay with my relative at night, all because she REFUSED to go to AL.
Do you or a sibling have POA? Without this it will be difficult to force the issue. If she is a fall risk (at that age, most are) it will be just a matter of time until a tumble lands her in the ER. At that point family steps in and declares it is no longer safe for her to live on her own. Arrangements will be made from there. Of course the other alternative would be for her to live with you or another family member. You need to think long and hard about this one as your life will be severely uprooted. It is an enormous responsibility and many of us simply are not up to the task. Dementia is very difficult to deal with on a day to day basis.
Best of luck to you as this is not an easy journey. It's nearly impossible to convince our parents to do what is best for them when they are past the point of reasoning.
Regarding guardianship, you may or may not have to have that additional court-ordered authority, but know that I found through three experiences with guardianship that it is an option that need not be terribly expensive or onerous and sometimes it is the only way to enable doing what is best for the person who needs your help.
Best wishes for your mom, you and the rest of your family.