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I have willingly assisted her with things such as changing linens etc., but I have back issues. I am pretty much here 24/7 and not many breaks only occasionally. Guess it would be nice if I could just relax a minute while she is here. I did feel bad for her one day as she complained about a patient being difficult to turn and she had pulled a muscle and was on muscle relaxants. Don't mean to sound nit picky about helping her but now she will ask me to put on my brace and help her pull my mother up in the bed. Really its more like a request and not asking if that makes sense. When hospice care first started another CNA showed me the best way to pull her up in bed if I didn't have help and this is what I do when my husband is not here during the day to help me. I know I can speak up if my back is hurting but just thinking she shouldn't be doing that. Do any of you all help the hospice workers out at times?

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No, YOU don't do the work - she does.
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We have a wonderful CNA who doesn’t ask for my help. I do help her when I ‘m nearby once in a while but 99 percent of the time she helps me. Hospices can be different but ours gives a list of what the CNA can do. Ours does not do any housework but she wouldn’t have time as she is busy the whole time she’s here.

I would tell tell her you can’t help due to injury, whatever and ask for a different aide. You don’t want your loved one to get hurt.
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The CNA should NOT be working if she is on muscle relaxers! What if she did something incorrectly to the patient, or administered the wrong meds? My mom's Hospice CNA is awesome and NEVER asks for help...In fact, when I do assist, she apologizes, but I feel it is my duty to help if I can and see that she needs it, but I am perfectly able to help. I would think that the Hospice the CNA works for wouldn't allow her to work if she is on muscle relaxers anyway; she would be a liability in my opinion and probably in their insurance's opinion as well!
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OH for the love of...NO. And I'd be letting her supervisor know ASAP. You are entitled to a wee bit of respite even if you have to do it all the other times. If this aide can't do her job then she should be replaced by the agency and at least for your home. I have just gone through some learning experience through a caregiver respite program. SO new to it all...so naive. Not any more. Anyhow first aide came with agency telling me how great a match she would be, mature, retired nurse yada yada. SHe was a lovely lady and I stupidly spent more time than I probably should have on the first visit getting to know her, but that was deliberate so that mom, who was sitting there, might be engaged in the conversation and establish rapport with her as well. In the course of the conversation the aide revealed having had a knee replacement and I thought then...oy...how is she going to get the base of the toilets cleaned? I should have said something to the agency and found a replacement then...because it became evident she never wanted to do housecleaning, and even when she did, she did a sloppy job of it and even did some damage...Is your mom especially heavy? Is there a lift that might help you and an aide to get her up?
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Countrygal55 Sep 2019
Thanks everyone for your input. It is very much appreciated. Gdaughter know what you mean about finding a good caregiver. Once I had a lady come for an interview because I was needing some occasional respite. In less than 15 minutes of talking (bless her) I came to the realization that my mother was in much better shape than she was!
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This is unacceptable!
You should contact the Hospice and ask to talk to her/his supervisor and explain what is going on.
If a CNA and not effectively care for their patient then they should assign 2 CNA's to visit if the one can not handle what needs to be done.
And if this person is doing this at each visit, other families then the Hospice needs to know that the employee can not do her/his job
The other big concern is if you were to be injured while helping that puts you out of commission, and if it is enough to require hospitalization of you who then cared for your Loved One? And would Hospice recognize that it is a fault of theirs and place your loved one in respite?
And what happens if your loved one is injured while an "untrained" person one that is not an employee is helping an employee.
And what happens if the CNA is injured while you are helping and can she "blame" you for the injury.
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I'm on Team Countrymouse.

Your CNA needs an additional CNA - one who is not you.

Current CNA may well be a competent CNA - but a 2-person weight requirement
requires, well, 2 people.
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I don't suppose you could go out when the CNA is there? But of course then you'd be left wondering what how she was managing alone.🙄

Do call and tell them what is happening, a different, more capable helper is needed.
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OMG 😮 ask for another CNA. This one is useless & takes advantage. It’s like having nobody . You should be able to leave the house as soon as she gets there...& do whatever you want. For a couple of hours at least.

Tomorrow morning first thing call hospice agency & ask for someone else.
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She shouldn't be doing that. If your mother requires two-person handling, the hospice should be sending two people. I don't mean to sound unsympathetic to her pulled muscle or, perhaps, her being overstretched in her job; but the CNA ought not to discuss her personal issues with you, certainly not other patients, and should DEFINITELY not be asking for physical help from someone she KNOWS to have a pre-existing injury.

Call the hospice office, explain that unfortunately you're not able to participate, and ask whether your mother's assessment requires one CNA or two. Don't complain about this request, but no more donning your back brace to help out either!
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The whole purpose of an aide is to give the family member a break. I have a bulging disk at times and try not to do anything to aggrevate it. I would call Hospice and ask for a replacement since this aide needs help and you really can't help without risking injuring to ur back which would mean u would have a problem helping Mom when an aide was not there.
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Countrygal55, I think it's fine for the hospice CNA to ask for help if the CNA knows you're willing and able to assist and if your helping is okay with her employer. My dad's CNAs got to know me quite well, frequently asked for my help and I was glad I was able to do that. CNAs are literally lifesavers but are financially underappreciated in the healthcare industry. That said, there's also nothing wrong with letting the CNA know when you're not comfortable assisting. Kudos to you for taking care of your mother in your home.
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