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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
It sounds like your mom is having hallucinations, i.e., seeing and hearing folks who aren't there? Have you talked to her doctor about this? There are meds that help.
You write in your profile that you think it might be time to place your mom in a facility where she could get more help but don't want to "put her away".
Placing and elderly parent isn't putting them away; it's getting them the 24/7 oversight and medical care they need and deserve. My opinion only.
Please don't look at it as putting her away. Look at it as placing her where she will be with staff trained to deal with her hysteria. If you place her in a facility it will not take the title of care-giver away from you - the function would just shift from day to day care to her advocate. You would be there to make sure her needs are met and you will visit her as her loving loving child.
Don't try and tell her that what she is seeing and/or hearing is not there - it won't do any good. It's her reality and you sometimes have to visit her reality. Do you know if they are people she knows or are they strangers? Does she know what these people want?
All you can do is reassure her that you are with her and nothing bad is going to happen to her. Try and redirect her attention to something else. Play music she likes or sing and try and get her to sing with you.
You also may need to see her dr and have him prescribe anti-anxiety medication to take the edge off. As the sun goes down try and have some bright lighting in the home. Try and not let her nap too much during the day. Both of those may help to keep the sundowning to a minimum. Keep her on a schedule, especially as evening approaches.
Be sure to have her checked for a UTI if this is new or unusual behavior for her. You can’t control anything but your reaction. Check out Teepa Snow YouTube videos. They might help you understand her situation a little better. I’m sorry you and your mom are going through this rough time. As the dementia progresses her symptoms will change. Ask her doctor for help.
#1....Placing her in Memory Care where she will have full time, round the clock care in a safe setting is by no means "giving up". And depending on the hallucinations and outbursts Memory Care might be safer for her and you.
Some types of dementia are more prone to hallucinations and anxiety. If she has not been properly diagnosed it can make medicating more difficult. And a person can have more than 1 type of dementia.
If you can when she is having a hallucination talk to her calmly in a quiet voice. Tell her that she is safe. If the hallucinations happen at a particular time or in a particular place you can try to prevent some of the anxiety. Close blinds in the evening so you can more easily control light and shadows. Closing blinds also prevents the windows from acting like mirrors seeing reflections can make it seem like there are more people in the house. shadows can also look like other things. A coat rack can look like a person standing in the hall for example. A pillow on a couch could look like an animal.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You write in your profile that you think it might be time to place your mom in a facility where she could get more help but don't want to "put her away".
Placing and elderly parent isn't putting them away; it's getting them the 24/7 oversight and medical care they need and deserve. My opinion only.
Don't try and tell her that what she is seeing and/or hearing is not there - it won't do any good. It's her reality and you sometimes have to visit her reality. Do you know if they are people she knows or are they strangers? Does she know what these people want?
All you can do is reassure her that you are with her and nothing bad is going to happen to her. Try and redirect her attention to something else. Play music she likes or sing and try and get her to sing with you.
You also may need to see her dr and have him prescribe anti-anxiety medication to take the edge off. As the sun goes down try and have some bright lighting in the home. Try and not let her nap too much during the day. Both of those may help to keep the sundowning to a minimum. Keep her on a schedule, especially as evening approaches.
I wish you the best.
You can’t control anything but your reaction. Check out Teepa Snow YouTube videos. They might help you understand her situation a little better. I’m sorry you and your mom are going through this rough time. As the dementia progresses her symptoms will change. Ask her doctor for help.
Some types of dementia are more prone to hallucinations and anxiety. If she has not been properly diagnosed it can make medicating more difficult.
And a person can have more than 1 type of dementia.
If you can when she is having a hallucination talk to her calmly in a quiet voice.
Tell her that she is safe.
If the hallucinations happen at a particular time or in a particular place you can try to prevent some of the anxiety.
Close blinds in the evening so you can more easily control light and shadows. Closing blinds also prevents the windows from acting like mirrors seeing reflections can make it seem like there are more people in the house.
shadows can also look like other things. A coat rack can look like a person standing in the hall for example. A pillow on a couch could look like an animal.