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He has verbally abused me for 4 and a half years. Now he’s doing it about my grandchildren. I’m on disability and can’t afford much. I need an apartment for seniors 55 and up. My income I do get has always went in the house. But he bullied me saying I won’t be allowed anything in the divorce because of my income even though his is $125000 yearly and he had me to leave my home when we married and he knew my situation.

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You may want to consider contacting a woman's shelter in your area. Even if you don't go there they may be a good source of information for what you are seeking. Or contact social services for your county. If your husband makes verbal threats to do physical harm to you, call 911 immediately. If you are able to discretely video him verbally abusing you or your grandchildren, you might want to consider doing this for evidence. Let us know how it goes. I hope you get all the help you need!
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There is no available monetary assistance that will assist in paying for your divorce. Sounds like hubby will contest it.

Divorces can cost less if the parties are amicable with no assets as you can practically do it yourself- only if both parties agree.

The above situation rarely happens when there are mutual assets & salaries. Aren’t you going to want/need alimony? If he makes that much you may be entitled to alimony.

You need to pay an attorney to get what you are entitled to. This will depend on years married, children, etc.

Divorce attorneys require retainers to start. Then you pay as you go.

I agree with Alva. Start squirreling away some money and save up for a retainer and more.

If your husband is abusive seek out a domestic violence woman’s shelter. Don’t become the next victim of domestic abuse.
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Stop paying any money into the house. Keep your money in your own account.

Start by contacting Legal Aid in your area and ask for their help.
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A woman's shelter maybe able to help you make a plan. First would be to find a place to go to. Then if SS check is deposited to a joint account, set up your own and have SS start sending ur funds to the new account. Stimulus is based on the last place you lived. If you didn't file taxes where they are electronically deposited, then u should get a check. If electronically deposited, need to find a way to stop that check from hitting the joint account. Maybe SS can help there. Once ur out of the house, set up a PO box for mail. You don't want ur new address out there. Don't sign up with anyone using your address always PO Box.

For me, I would not want anything from this man. I would walk away with what I could carry. You can divorce without the other persons permission. My friend didn't know she was divorced until she got the paperwork. As long as you are not asking for anything, it should not cost you a whole lot. There is legal aid.
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I am afraid I don't know of any attorneys who would handle a divorce low cost. You might want to check with women's shelters in your area as I would think they may be able to guide you to resources. As this would not be a simple "no fault" divorce because your husband has charge of the assets (assuming you are not on any accounts) you would really require a lawyer rather than self-filing. I think start to pilfer away any money you are able. Start with the fact that the federal government is currently in the process of sending you a 600.00 check. I hope you will have friends or family to take you in until you can get settled. Wishing you good luck.
I will give you one more option that I would say is for the desperate. That would be to go to a local Hospital ER (yes, risky right now; so you may want to save and wait and plan on this one for the Spring), tell them you are being threatened and abused. You are not, according to you yourself being physically abused, so you are unlikely to get admission of any kind, but you may get access to Social Workers who could guide you to housing and to help.
I honestly don't have any other options. You need to start saving every penny you can beg, borrow or steal from the family coffers; you will need it until a division of assets can come through.
I am a bit confused how you are on disability with a husband making 125,000 a year, but that at the moment is I guess neither here nor there.
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Some lawyers will give you a 'free' 1/2 hour consult and help you to find forms and such you fill out online. My son is a lawyer and does a LOT of pro bono work. If you lived in Seattle, I'd give you his info.

Your abusive husband will probably have to pay you something--unless you had a prennup--he doesn't make so much that that seems probable.

First off, get yourself to a safe space, save as much as you can, avail yourself of all the free services through battered women's shelters and their advocacies.

You will hopefully get a stimulus check for you--I have retired, but both DH and I got separate ones. ( I'm talking about the first round).

Doesn't sound like he's going to be 'amicable'--abusive men rarely are--but facing legal wrangling, he'd come out better off financially if he settles a sum on you and you can start over.

I hope you have friends/relatives/church family you can reach out to. I have a friend who is in the exact same position as you---but she cannot bring herself to leave her home. After years of abuse and neglect, that's her 'norm' and she seems content to simply complain endlessly. You deserve a peaceful, happy life.
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I hope that you have proof that you paid towards the house, because that changes everything you can get.

Ignore his fat mouth bs. He doesn't get to decide what you get. The judge will decide.

Call divorce attorneys and ask for a free consultation. Many do this and they can guide you through the process.

Just a quick thought. If you didn't seek a divorce in 5.5 years you can collect against his SS and make more money. Ask an attorney about the situation and see if you can get a work around so that you can benefit in that way.

Best of luck finding a way through this terrible situation.
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