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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Ed, this is when we use "theraputic fibs" when someone ask to go home. In fact, many times when a person at memory care says they want to go home, they usually mean their childhood home, where life was so much easier.
You can fib by saying "the house is being painted", "the doctor won't let you go back home until you feel better" or whatever excuse you think your spouse would understand.
The following are not solutions but more a comment on my experience with MIL. Up until about a year or so ago, she would also ask to go home whenever we (my husband &I, SIL & her family) would visit. We knew though that she probably would forget this a few seconds after we walked out the door which is par for the course with memory loss. Now, she will still cry when we visit but has stopped asking to go home. By the way there are many comments on this site under AD Q&A about how the loved one with AD is not asking to go to their most current home but are wanting to go back to their childhood home which makes this issue more poignant. We try to distract her, as we're leaving,: "oh, almost forgot, here we got this for you" as I take from my tote bag , some cookies or chocolates (she still loves her sweet treats). Strength to you in this very tough time.
This is really sad, and hard on you, isn't it? My husband packed a little bag and stood by the door waiting for a train to take him home. He was at home, the house we'd lived is for about 20 years. But in his reality he was in a train station, waiting to go who knows where?
"Going home" may not really be about a physical place. It is perhaps the sense of wanting to go back in time to when the world made sense and the loved one could manage everyday tasks.
Sometimes when things are not going well, I say, "Bwaa ... I want my mommy!" I don't mean that literally. For one thing, Mom is gone, but even when she was alive I wouldn't call her in those circumstances. I just mean I wish I could have someone to pat me on the back and assure me everything would work out. I realize that is what I mean. I don't think my husband could comprehend what he really wanted. He certainly couldn't articulate it! He just wanted things to be like they used to be, and there is no way to accomplish that.
What does the staff tell you about how your spouse does between your visits? Has she settled in fairly well?
Staff says her actions vary. Sometimes when I do not come when she expects me, she get upset. Other times, no problem. She sometimes acts if she does not really know where she is...thinks she is in a hospital at times or hotel.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
You can fib by saying "the house is being painted", "the doctor won't let you go back home until you feel better" or whatever excuse you think your spouse would understand.
"Going home" may not really be about a physical place. It is perhaps the sense of wanting to go back in time to when the world made sense and the loved one could manage everyday tasks.
Sometimes when things are not going well, I say, "Bwaa ... I want my mommy!" I don't mean that literally. For one thing, Mom is gone, but even when she was alive I wouldn't call her in those circumstances. I just mean I wish I could have someone to pat me on the back and assure me everything would work out. I realize that is what I mean. I don't think my husband could comprehend what he really wanted. He certainly couldn't articulate it! He just wanted things to be like they used to be, and there is no way to accomplish that.
What does the staff tell you about how your spouse does between your visits? Has she settled in fairly well?