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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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My husband is going into permanent care on Monday 10am. I am very worried how I will get him out of car and through the doors of the facility. I know he won’t go willingly. Remember. I am in Australia
The NH will help you with that. They help people in and out of homes all the time. Mom went by ambulance straight from hospital to skilled nursing rehab in NH.
Can you call the home and see what they suggest? They may send someone to your home to pick him up. I didn’t drive mom there. The ambulance drove to the hospital and got her. I followed in my car. Go the day before to sign all paperwork. That’s what I did.
A lot of people have had to resort to trickery, the success of that is going to depend on how aware he is. Is there anyone there you might tell him you want to visit? Can you tell him you are taking him there for a clinic - toe nail trimming, hearing/vision check... Stopping in because you have a coupon for a free meal (print one off) Mention some form of entertainment that you want to participate in I don't suppose he'd be willing to go "for a few days" while you are away for ???
No. Been a n respite twice. Went well according to staff but he says it was a living hell. It wasn’t. He is desperate to see his mother. Luckily, although it’s in the same group of homes it is not the same one. I thought I would hide his bag so he doesn’t catch on and tell him we are going to visit his brother and mother as a surprise. My son will come too. Just hate the deceit.
How did it go with transportation? How are you doing? It’s a hard day but a necessary one. Hope all is well with you. Hope everything is going well for your husband.
Hi Panda, I don't have any brilliant ideas for you with how to get DH into the NH, but I wanted to wish you the best of luck with what lies ahead. I see this already happened yesterday..........how did it go? Please check in and let us know. Sending you a hug, I know how hard this journey really is
Told him we were going together for two days so staff put an extra bed in the room First two days he rang me every 15 to 20 minutes. In between these times he was ringing my son. I have put my phone on silent and stopped listening to the voice mails then blocked his number. Son kept answering until facility spoke to me to get son to do the same Day three no calls because staff did something to his phone. He will not hand it over. Day three staff called me twice about any advice on how to deal with him as with FTD they don’t forget what they are told and can’t be re directed. He just will not stop demanding to leave, will not rest or join in activities and continues to ask same things over and over
i am going there now to sign paperwork to allow them to call in their own doctor to change his dosage on meds etc. my greatest worry now is that he will go to a specialist psychiatric ward who have more at their discretion to deal with him
Panda, I know the thought of a psych ward is heartbreaking but many here on the forum have told us it was invaluable in finding ways to stabilize their loved ones, hopefully they can help him.
Don't be afraid of the psych evaluations, Panda, my mom was sent for psych evaluations a few times. There they would find a med combo that would help her feel more comfortable. The meds were quite strong and each time my mom would become more comfortable. I now, often think that mom also had undiagnosed FTD in addition to Alzheimer's. She was completely unmanageable.
I know how hard this must be on you and your husband. Remember, most importantly, they will find a way to help him better cope, which is scary because of the strength of the meds and how much more he will sleep and relax. Also important to remember is that he would not want to be feeling this way either. Taking someone home is not a viable option.
My mom was eventually kicked out of memory care. She was on hospice at the time and they recommended a much smaller care home where the caregiver/resident ratio was much lower. And it was cheaper and would have been a better fit for her from the beginning.
Mom also had to have 24/7 caregivers, an additional cost, to keep her engaged and hopefully out of trouble.
Best wishes to you and hubby. Stay strong, kind of a emotional detachment, and have faith that the pros will be able to find a solution. Trust them.
If the facility will not let him return, do not take him home! Use the social workers to find another facility, maybe a care home?
My Mom also was evaluated in a Geriatric Psychiatric Facility.
The facility was great. It was very peaceful. No, the patients were not over drugged and zombie like.
Actually, my Mom wanted to stay after they had her stabilized. That took 10 days. The staff were amazing.
Mom’s Geriatric Physician had done all he could do to get the med combo right. He is the one that suggested the evaluation.
Mom was treated by a Geriatric Psychiatrist during her evaluation and yes, I think that made a huge difference in getting the med combo right.
Mom was then visited by a Psych Service at the Nursing Home and her meds were tweaked occasionally.
Sadly there is still a stigma concerning Psych Facilities. My own sister had a meltdown because our Mom was going to a Psych Facility. Sis did finally get herself together and visit Mom in the Facility. She loved the place also.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
The NH will help you with that. They help people in and out of homes all the time. Mom went by ambulance straight from hospital to skilled nursing rehab in NH.
Can you call the home and see what they suggest? They may send someone to your home to pick him up. I didn’t drive mom there. The ambulance drove to the hospital and got her. I followed in my car. Go the day before to sign all paperwork. That’s what I did.
Is there anyone there you might tell him you want to visit?
Can you tell him you are taking him there for a clinic - toe nail trimming, hearing/vision check...
Stopping in because you have a coupon for a free meal (print one off)
Mention some form of entertainment that you want to participate in
I don't suppose he'd be willing to go "for a few days" while you are away for ???
How did it go with transportation? How are you doing? It’s a hard day but a necessary one. Hope all is well with you. Hope everything is going well for your husband.
Sending you a hug, I know how hard this journey really is
First two days he rang me every 15 to 20 minutes. In between these times he was ringing my son. I have put my phone on silent and stopped listening to the voice mails then blocked his number. Son kept answering until facility spoke to me to get son to do the same
Day three no calls because staff did something to his phone. He will not hand it over. Day three staff called me twice about any advice on how to deal with him as with FTD they don’t forget what they are told and can’t be re directed. He just will not stop demanding to leave, will not rest or join in activities and continues to ask same things over and over
i am going there now to sign paperwork to allow them to call in their own doctor to change his dosage on meds etc. my greatest worry now is that he will go to a specialist psychiatric ward who have more at their discretion to deal with him
I know this is really hard for you. Wish it was an easier transition for you. Transitional times are the worst!
I know how hard this must be on you and your husband. Remember, most importantly, they will find a way to help him better cope, which is scary because of the strength of the meds and how much more he will sleep and relax. Also important to remember is that he would not want to be feeling this way either. Taking someone home is not a viable option.
My mom was eventually kicked out of memory care. She was on hospice at the time and they recommended a much smaller care home where the caregiver/resident ratio was much lower. And it was cheaper and would have been a better fit for her from the beginning.
Mom also had to have 24/7 caregivers, an additional cost, to keep her engaged and hopefully out of trouble.
Best wishes to you and hubby. Stay strong, kind of a emotional detachment, and have faith that the pros will be able to find a solution. Trust them.
If the facility will not let him return, do not take him home! Use the social workers to find another facility, maybe a care home?
My Mom also was evaluated in a Geriatric Psychiatric Facility.
The facility was great. It was very peaceful. No, the patients were not over drugged and zombie like.
Actually, my Mom wanted to stay after they had her stabilized. That took 10 days. The staff were amazing.
Mom’s Geriatric Physician had done all he could do to get the med combo right. He is the one that suggested the evaluation.
Mom was treated by a Geriatric Psychiatrist during her evaluation and yes, I think that made a huge difference in getting the med combo right.
Mom was then visited by a Psych Service at the Nursing Home and her meds were tweaked occasionally.
Sadly there is still a stigma concerning Psych Facilities. My own sister had a meltdown because our Mom was going to a Psych Facility. Sis did finally get herself together and visit Mom in the Facility. She loved the place also.