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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
PinkyMayB, it is time to take back your life. You been caring for g'ma a long time. "You're talking to the disease" may be helpful in the early stages, but it doesn't help you anymore. You must seek help. This is one disease that affects the entire family. A homecare agency may be of benefit, but I think a care facility is where you need to look. You're caregiving won't get any easier. An ALF or MC would be appropriate for g'ma depending where she is in her dementia journey. You may feel a sense of guilt for having to place her, but I think a sense of relief will be stronger. If she's still in he own house, selling it will provide some capital to fund a care facility. Good luck.
My gma is in stage 5 and I've been taking care of her for 6 years now. I have a lot of support from my family and the most wonderful husband in the world. I have reached the frustration and burnout stage now I am way past that. I have found that finding the humor in it helps a ton.
I also have little sayings that help me through the hard times and was hoping to pick up some new ones. For example a fellow caregiver from a support group told me "when nothing is going right, go left". IDK maybe I'm a little nuts as well, but it helps.
I love my grandma to pieces and although there isnt much left of her in there, she still surfaces from time to time and I wouldn't give up these last years with her for anything.
Is this an actual chat group or just an add to push people into putting their loved ones in homes? No offense but that seemed like a drastic response to my question.
I apologize if you took umbrage with my response to your situation. You mentioned that the "stress is changing me and taking a toll on my marriage" and "I am beyond burnt out". Those are serious caregiver issues and why I phrased my response like I did. For me saying "it's the disease and not the person" just didn't help anymore. God love you for your dedication to g'ma and give you the strength to carry on.
"although there isnt much left of her in there, she still surfaces from time to time and I wouldn't give up these last years with her for anything".
That's just how Teepa Snow describes the 'Pearl' stage. Have you seen any of her videos? She is a dementa care expert. Lots on her website & youtube.
I know someone who uses the phrase "this too shall pass". It helps them 😍.
I wear a necklace that's my 'I'm on duty' to remind me to stay in the caring mode & I try to add yoga or breathing exercises to every day. There are countless free YouTube's to find something that helps you unwind.
Your Grandmother is very lucky indeed to have you.
Pinky, if you can do it then do it. But a number of us caregivers are considered Seniors caring for Seniors. Some with their own health issues. I was 65 when my Mom came to live with me, she 86. At the stage she was in it was like having a toddler in my house. Waking up in the middle of the night when I myself finally got to sleep. I am 5ft tall with no upper body strength. Just helping Mom out of her chair did a number on my back. Not to mention bathing and toileting her. Also, my house is a split level. Not good for someone who can't do steps. I eventually placed her in an AL right up the street. She was able to socialize and walk all over the facility. Eventually, money ran out and LTC was needed. She was in her final stage. She knew no one. She needed more care than I was able to give.
Sorry if we seem to "push" placing a loved one. Maybe you are a "Caregiver". Not all of us are. And some push themselves to where now their health is compromised. We just want these people to know that its OK to say "I can't do this" and find alternatives.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I also have little sayings that help me through the hard times and was hoping to pick up some new ones. For example a fellow caregiver from a support group told me "when nothing is going right, go left". IDK maybe I'm a little nuts as well, but it helps.
I love my grandma to pieces and although there isnt much left of her in there, she still surfaces from time to time and I wouldn't give up these last years with her for anything.
Is this an actual chat group or just an add to push people into putting their loved ones in homes? No offense but that seemed like a drastic response to my question.
That's just how Teepa Snow describes the 'Pearl' stage. Have you seen any of her videos? She is a dementa care expert. Lots on her website & youtube.
I know someone who uses the phrase "this too shall pass". It helps them 😍.
I wear a necklace that's my 'I'm on duty' to remind me to stay in the caring mode & I try to add yoga or breathing exercises to every day. There are countless free YouTube's to find something that helps you unwind.
Your Grandmother is very lucky indeed to have you.
I was 65 when my Mom came to live with me, she 86. At the stage she was in it was like having a toddler in my house. Waking up in the middle of the night when I myself finally got to sleep. I am 5ft tall with no upper body strength. Just helping Mom out of her chair did a number on my back. Not to mention bathing and toileting her. Also, my house is a split level. Not good for someone who can't do steps. I eventually placed her in an AL right up the street. She was able to socialize and walk all over the facility. Eventually, money ran out and LTC was needed. She was in her final stage. She knew no one. She needed more care than I was able to give.
Sorry if we seem to "push" placing a loved one. Maybe you are a "Caregiver". Not all of us are. And some push themselves to where now their health is compromised. We just want these people to know that its OK to say "I can't do this" and find alternatives.