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Just purely an opinion from this old California gal. I had POA for financial and Trustee of Trust drawn up with my brother and I and his attorney present. When I took these papers here and there and everywhere in the next year I was assured over and over again that it was important exactly WHAT and HOW the POA was written, mine has sections a-e written out including specifics about how it doesn't lapse if the mentality of my bro DID and etc. When I asked about certain accounts and CDs I was told by banker "depends on how it is written in your POA". Nothing in my POA was questioned and at one point the lawyer drawing it up and examining my bro asked if he was certain of what he wanted, as this POA and Trustee of Trust gave me "the right to sell the gold out of your teeth, Dee.". So for myself alone, I would spend the money and get the DPOA done by a lawyer. And Cali is correct, in California filing is not necessary and is very rarely done.
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Ginna011 Sep 2020
Careful !

u take an oath
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So, your mom is being cared for by your SiL?

Are you eager to take over the care of your mom who, according to your profile, has Alzheimers?
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The OP has not returned.

Additionally, note that the SIL is the one doing the caregiving.

One should NEVER take on caregiving without having POA.
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Ginna011 Sep 2020
I’m actually confused how they CAN do it .. U have to make life choices

I’m DPOA for my mom , 3 years now , helped w my dad who died at home

my moms different , she’s ALZ .

my dad was retired military , VA PAID EVERYTHING

MY MOM , gets his military TRI Care for life but benefits are different for the widow

THEY PAY INSURANCE,., not Homecare or nursing homes

we are now over 3 years in , spending ever dime my mom had before Medicare will pay ...

u have to spend all assets first

MY MOM AND DAD PREPARED

I thank god and my mom and dad saved..that my mom is so taken care of ...

I love my mom , can’t see her and hold her hand , since 3/20 , due to COVID , she’s in nursing care. hospice said we can SEE HER END OF LIFE .. , they will let us know .

My mom has six kids , she’s a retired military wife of a RETIRED ARMY VETERAN, but we can’t see her ..

BECAUSE SHE HAD MONEY ..

she pays 10,650 a month

BUT WE CANT SEE HER , she MIGHT CATCH COVID .., lol

Well her 6 kids at this point think REALLY !

She has less then 6 months to live

we get notified at last 2 weeks .

So we can see her ..

thats AMERICA NOW

I PRAY EVERYDAY

yep I know the law on EVERYTHING RELATING TO FINANCIALS AND LEGAL FORMS .. ARMY BRAT
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Why do you need to know?
And where is your brother in all of this?
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Barb,

I wholeheartedly agree. I only had medPOA for mom so I could do all of the doctor’s appointments.

My mom didn’t think it was necessary for me to have complete POA even though I was doing everything for her.

It was perplexing to me that she made my brothers feel important because they were guys. I was the ‘daughter’ who was supposed to be the caregiver who didn’t question her or my brothers. Her plan backfired on her when I got fed up with all of them.

You are right. If the caregiver is doing all of the work they should get complete POA.
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To have it Mom would have had to see a lawyer and assigned her. Since POAs don't have to be filed by County Clerk, you just need to ask to see the paperwork. If dated when Mom was diagnosed with Dementia, its not legal. She has to be competent to assign a POA. Why would your SIL have it and not ur brother.
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worriedinCali Sep 2020
Her mom would not have had to see a lawyer in order to legally assign a POA. They are in California. Lawyers are not necessary for this.
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Tell her you won't believe it until you see it.  If she refuses or fails to produce a conformed copy, tell her if she can't prove her claims, you won't believe her.
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I'm always happy to ask the dumb question: have you asked your SIL for sight of her POA document?
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Does your mother have dementia? Are you able to ask her?
Have you asked your brother.
Have you asked his wife.
Why do you wish to know the answer to this at this time?
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Well, I suppose I'll state the obvious here and say ask your sister-in-law to produce this document and show it to you. Let me ask a question though. When your mom gets admitted into the hospital, who calls to let you know she's there? If it's the hospital calling then you are recognized as her next of kin. If you ask them if they have a POA on file, they will tell you. You and your siblings unless she has a living spouse are her next of kin. Unless your SIL has been appointed as her conservator. I'd bet my money that she hasn't been because if she was she'd be saying so and boasting to you about it. POA's have to be done in a lawyer's office and they are legal documents. This is not something your mom could have written on a sheet of paper with your SIL's name on it. My guess would be that your SIL is lying. Talk to your brother if you can. There's definitely something fishy going on here and it's your SIL.
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worriedinCali Sep 2020
Power of attorneys DO NOT have to be done in a lawyers office!! You can draw one up yourself or print a standard form online. It just needs to be witnessed and notorized.
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