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My son is stationed in Fort Sill, Oklahoma. My daughter-in-law is having their first baby and I want to be there when my granddaughter is born. But, I take care of my Alzheimer’s mom. So I was wondering is there some help out there.

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Many memory care residences offer respite care for caregivers like you to be able to take a break. Call the ones in your area and see what might be available. I hope you find a good option, your well being matters too, and of course you deserve to see that new baby!
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A local Memory Care facility would do respite. The hope is that you would select them when the time came to look for full time MC. And you may find that the adjustment has gone well and make the decision to keep her in MC.
Tour a few places and ask what the procedure would be for respite.
A note though..if there is the slightest possibility that mom would have to go onto Medicaid make sure the facility you select accepts Medicaid. This way you would not have to move her at a later date.
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Medicare will pay for a certain number of respite days in a nursing home or memory care facility. This way you can get a break.
Contact Medicare. It is a tedious process getting in touch with them but worth it.
Or ask your mother's doctor about Medicare respite.
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Most Nursing Homes offer Respite Care Syays. You would pay out of pocket. The rates in my area are $300-500/,day and require a 3 to 5 day minimum stay.
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Congratulations Grandma, and thank your son for his service and commitment!

There are a lot of places you can send your mother while you're out of town, and you may even be able to "sell it" to her as a vacation while you're away, but you might consider if it would be safer and happier for mom to stay home while you are away, and yes, you can have your cake and eat it too!

A reputable Nurse Registry or Home Healthcare Agency would be able to provide a highly qualified, live-in caregiver for your mom while you are gone. You can facetime her every day to check in on her, and she could have the comfort of being at home.

Because you will not be there to supervise, I strongly suggest you use an Agency rather than a private caregiver you find on Craigslist. Emergencies happen to even the best and most responsible caregivers, so having a company that can quickly replace the caregiver if something happens will give you peace of mind and allow you to enjoy your new grandchild! ~BRAD
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Most nursing homes or assisted living facilities have some respite beds. Call around but be prepared…it is pricy.
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Sometimes Adult Family Homes or skilled nursing homes will take them for a week. It will effect your Mom's mental state, just so you are aware. She may change quite a bit while you are gone, and will take quite awhile to adjust back once you are back. If you have the time, you may want to make the adjustment beforehand, like take her there a week or two earlier, and help her adjust. Or visit, then stay. Depending on your time frame. Another option would be to hire someone to stay with your Mom. I would start that asap too, finding the right person and then slowly getting your Mom used to them. This is a huge endeavor either way, so plan for that to try and make it the best adjustment for your Mom and yourself as well. Do you have anyone else helping you? I would get some help in general, even without the travel plans. You will get very burnt out, otherwise.
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Speak with a local social worker about respite care for family caregivers. Medicare may cover it, and might also be able to recommend a place for your Mom.
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Sheri6185 Dec 2022
medicare doesn’t cover in house respite
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Nothing to add to the great responses but CONGRATULATIONS GRANDMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Good question my wife has Alzheimer’s and can’t walk. I had to give up my business that required travel to take care of her. I no longer work. Sometimes I dream about a vacation.
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dkiely33 Dec 2022
There are resources out there for respite care. Read the responses here and you'll see that.
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I agree with SueGood....your mom's medicare insurance may cover the cost for her stay at a facility while you are gone. Also in the meantime, you should be checking on getting her help through your local senior services agency. My mom is getting caregiver help 5 days a week (and she even lives with me) . A representative from senior services will come to evaluate her to see what caregiver services she qualifies for. I know here in Illinois they are pretty particular and the rating scale is high. Would be nice to see her get that ASAP. As for the help for when you are gone, SueGood has a very goo idea. Call her insurance. Talk to them also.
Good luck!!
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Call your local Agency on Aging
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Tarema: Perhaps you could speak to your locality's Council on Aging in an effort to assist with your query. Congratulations on becoming a grandmother soon!
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Maybe consider respite in a board &care. In my area these are assisted living/ memory care homes in residential neighborhoods. Maximum of six residents. My mom has dementia and is currently in a board &care respite for 10 days, while my husband and I take a vacation. It is costing $200 per day. I added a couple days respite at the end of vacation to get caught up here at home before I go pick her up. I think the smaller size of a home in a residential area suits my mom with dementia better than a larger facility. It has gone very well. I hope you find something that works for you and your mom. Congratulations on your upcoming grandchild!
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Medicare and Medicaid will pay for a certain number of respite care days in a nursing home. In Connecticut it was ten days per year.
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1. Speak with local Alzheimer/ Dementia groups such as ARK, Agency on Aging etc. They may have some direction.

2. Call facility ( ies) of your choice near you and ask them directly if they accommodate needs such as yours for your mother and, about if they take Medicare , or Medicaid or other insurance as payment. Their administration should be able to answer some questions.

3. You may also want to consider having your mother assessed for Hospice admit appropriateness. If a pt. is on hospice care at home , one of the hospice benefits is 5 day respite placement of the pt at different intervals ( paid for by hospice) for the caregiver break needs such as yours. Hospice, remember, is about quality of life in the midst of a life limiting illness, not about dying.
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Yes! Contact local residential facilities for respite options. Check with her insurance company to see if respite care is covered.
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