My Aunt died on March 17, 2021. She never liked me or my mom. I never cared for her. I hope I’m not sounding like a bad person, it’s been a hard week. My mom will finally be in nursing home full time, that’s a good sign her health is declining. Anyways my Aunt died I felt nothing, no tears, I had to fake it while my dad cried. I felt nothing, still don’t. Does that make me a bad person? Has anyone on here ever felt like this or it it just me?
He had abused/molested me into my adult years---and who knows how many other kids?
How do you rake up sorrow for someone who took away from you that which was NOT THEIRS to take?
My mom snarkily said to me "well, I hope you're happy now". I just told her I was grateful he could no longer father any more children to ruin. No, I wasn't HAPPY, I wasn't ANYTHING.
As far as being a good person or a bad person, I do the best I can. I am not up for Sainthood. When you get there they fill you full of arrows, kill you, and pray to you for eternity to cure everything in the world. Not a good job description.
Best out to you. If you are not a Saint, but just a struggling human being doing the best you can, then join my club!
ACTIONS define the kind of person you are.
If you don't feel grief, don't express grief. There are plenty of ways of mourning a person's loss, of paying your respects to her, and certainly of comforting those who do grieve and will miss her and have their own memories of her without sobbing your heart out. There shouldn't be any need to fake *anything.*
Any person's death is a moment for sober reflection, at the very least: read John Donne's sermon on the subject. But assuming you didn't wear a ra-ra skirt and sing ding-dong the witch is dead I can't imagine in what way you think you even might have behaved like a "bad person."
and this... “assuming you didn't wear a ra-ra skirt and sing ding-dong the witch is dead” gave me a much needed laugh today:)
At least I won’t see them never again cause they live in different states one is married.I’m in my car gonna start my new life going back to Nevada this week where I been living and my permanent home.
With caring for your mom that may be taking all the emotion you can give now.
And if you were not close it would be the same as if the neighbor down the street had died, would you cry for them?
and do not let anyone try to make you feel bad that you are not "emotional enough"
Everyone deals with grief and sometimes relief in their own way.
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