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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mom was neglected in a nursing home....neglected UTI resulted in some kidney damage. Not eating and barely will drink. Is there anything other than soup ? She has dementia also. I do have her home with me.
I lost my mom a year ago tomorrow. A week before she passed away I tried to get her to take just a few sips but she looked at me and said "please don't make me". I assured her I wouldn't. I had already called hospice. That night was the last time my mom talked to me. She never regained consciousness, and a week later she was gone. My point is respect their wishes. I miss her, but I am so grateful that I did what she wanted me to do. Prior to that they did add thickeners to her juice. Funny thing was, even though she had dementia and couldn't remember a lot, she sure knew she didn't like that stuff in her juice. Hang in there, but hospice may be your lifesaver right now.
Thank you, pipruby, I was just going to ask whether the problem was drawing up on a straw or swallowing. If sucking on the straw is a problem, the only answer is spoon feeding, so to speak. My mom could still suck up through a straw but would often start choking when she tried to swallow. She COULD swallow and congealed foods foods (such as puddings, custards, pureed baby food) but wasn't good with anything that was either very liquid or was the slightest bit chunky (EVEN something as thin as natural applesauce was no good). You can pretty easily control not giving chunky food but liquids can be a problem. There are several manufacturers that make thickeners that you can add to juice or water so that liquid doesn't choke the patient.
When I cared for my mom last year..it was about this time last year she decided that she couldn't eat any more. I remember trying over and over again to get her to drink and every time I did she would gag. At what point should you keep trying?...no one knows. But I will say when she did it was more scary to see her choking and gagging. She was frightened as well. When the brain shuts down, they forget how to swallow. Please call her physician or Hospice to help. They are such a relief when it comes to this. They will make her comfortable and keep her medicated. I'm so sorry...I hope you have better days. God Bless.
Laurie, please look into Hospice. They can come to your home to help you keep Mom comfortable. I lost my mother six years ago to complications of kidney failure and dialysis dementia. My biggest regret is that I did not start Hopice care sooner.
What is it you expect or want to happen? Do you have her DPOA? Is there a DNR? When she did not have dementia and was not impaired, did the two of you discuss what she wanted in this eventuality? How much heroic treatment to have even if the end result is now terminal?
The best thing to do is find an excellent Hospice and have them come in and do an evaluation for appropriateness. They will give you information that will help you decide which direction to go in.
It is a difficult thing to have the responsibility of literally holding someone's life in your hands. But it only FEELS that way. In reality, what you must remember is that they appointed you as their agent. This means you are supposed to direct and accomplish, on their behalf, what they themselves wanted had they been able to make the choice. knowing what they wanted and helping to fulfill their choices is one of the final showings of respect to you can give them.
With dementia eventually she will lose interest in food. A feeding tube can keep her alive but at what cost? My mom had a advanced directive to which she instructed no life sustaining procedures. As hard as it was to watch she was ready and keeping her comfortable physically was all we could do. The Hospice can come in and help with that. I'm sorry Good luck and God Bless.
I don't know about what foods would be good, but my mom has been sick lately and we used oral syringes to put fluids in her mouth. The pharmacist sent them for the meds but since she was barely awake and pretty much non-responsive I used them to get water, juice, and soup in her. I warmed up some tuna and scrambled an egg with cheese to get some protein in her without too much chewing necessary. She also had yogurt. We did the popsicle thing too. I microwaved them for just a few seconds and then used a spoon to get the bits in her mouth. I'm so sorry to hear that your mom was neglected and I am so glad that she has you to look out for her. I hope the new year will be better....
Talk with her doctor, ask him for suggestions on keeping her hydrated and nourished. Does she have a living will or end of life directives? Check on these things before feeding tubes and other measures are undertaken...talk with your doctor about hospice, he will know if that is the direction you should be looking...praying you find the best way to deal with a not very good situation...
What does her doctor say? A feeding tube can be placed, but know dementia is a terminal illness. One does not recover from that. Have you called hospice?
Does she have a kidney specialist who can advise you as to what food and fluids are OK for her? If not, at least ask her primary care doctor for advice.The extent of kidney damage determines how much sodium and protein she should have. If your concern is she can no longer drink fluids from a straw, ice pops might be one way of handling thirst. You could even break ice off the stick and spoon feed her.If I think of anything else, I'll post again. Good luck.
If she has kidney damage then go easy on the canned soup thing, it's loaded with sodium I know. There are protein drinks out there that have to be better than that, Advocare makes some really good meal replacement shakes that are pre-digested so they're easy to breakdown the nutrients. Unfortunately nursing homes are like our over crowded schools these days, 30 students for 1 teacher. With that many or more patients needing different things at different times and only a few workers per ward, this stuff happens. Doesn't make it right, just a fact I guess. That's why whenever possible Adult Foster Care is the way to go, which is kinda like being home schooled instead of institutionalized.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
I lost my mother six years ago to complications of kidney failure and dialysis dementia. My biggest regret is that I did not start Hopice care sooner.
The best thing to do is find an excellent Hospice and have them come in and do an evaluation for appropriateness. They will give you information that will help you decide which direction to go in.
It is a difficult thing to have the responsibility of literally holding someone's life in your hands. But it only FEELS that way. In reality, what you must remember is that they appointed you as their agent. This means you are supposed to direct and accomplish, on their behalf, what they themselves wanted had they been able to make the choice. knowing what they wanted and helping to fulfill their choices is one of the final showings of respect to you can give them.