She has become more and more helpless now that she is living with me. She cries constantly when she's not asleep. She is a Type 1 diabetic and needs help seeing her insulin pump. She says, "You KNOW I cant see, so do this, do that, etc." I'd like to see her happier and come to terms with her loss of vision. I don't feel she's trying, just whining and defeated.
It might help you to understand her new reality if you spend a few hours wearing a pair of wrap around sunglasses with the lenses obscured to imitate her degree of vision loss....I'm sure she is entitled to be scared and frustrated!!! My mom benefited greatly from the tips, training and low vision aids available through the CNIB (we're in Canada). I'm sure the American equivalent would be just as helpful.
Contact your local and state health departments and inquire what resources they have for low and loss of vision. I learned from one of the senior expos that my state actually has a department that deals with vision loss.
Check out local DMEs for special devices that enlarge print, can be worn, etc.
Get books or tapes that can be listened to; try to change the method of information intake from visual to audio.
And find out why she's losing her vision - does she have macular degeneration? Is she being treated for it, and what's the prognosis?
Then put yourself in her place for a day or week; list everything she does and how much of it depends on visual orientation. Then try to imagine what can be done to assist her in EACH of those tasks, such as using her insulin pump.
Also plan for some relaxation time to take her mind off her fears. Play her favorite CDs, just sit and talk - divert her attention to something happier.
It wouldn't hurt to ask her PCP or internist, or opthalomologist to prescribe for home care OT for awhile to help her adapt.
I have the impression that through her vision loss she's losing the sense of how to do everything she's done and she's terrified, as I would be too.
As far as the cry etc ate concerned i supect she has an underlying depression which is natural and to be expected so start with her PCP and ask about antidepressents and avisit to a councillor. is there a blind association close by? Thesy may have all kinds of assistance, group meetings, classes and outings that she may enjoy with other blind people. She does need a lot of help but can still become fairly independent. For example she may confuse colors so selecting clothes for the day is something reasonable to help with but she can dress herself. make the house hazard free and don't move things around or leave clutter. not safe around the cooker but put raised numbers on the microwave and leave something in the fridge she can warm up if you are not there. Encourage her to do parts of tasks, for example she can feel the cutlery in the drawer and bring that to the dining room table. i am sure there are aides for the blind that can teach her some simple brail. Just a few letters will be helpfull. practice with her and encourage. There may also be some dementia going on so that also needs to be assessed. lots of reassurance that she is not alone and will be looked after. Never make promises you can not keep.
If there is a blind center near you talk to them about support groups, assistive devices, etc. Get magnifying glasses - there are many different sizes and shapes, and some with their own lighting. Most of all, don't give in to the pity party, at least not while you are with her. She needs to move forward.