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When mom gets up at night to go to the bathroom she had fallen a few times in the last few months. We already had one trip to the emergency room. She says she waits for hours for help?! I'm sure that can't be true. I have reminded her several times to ask for help but she won't, she says she doesn't want to be a bother. I'm very worried that a fall sometime soon she'll break something. Not sure how to help her.....Any ideas?

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Does she have a call button? How is she supposed to summon help?

My mother was in a nursing home with her dementia. In 2 and half years she did not learn to use the call button. When one of us children happened to be with her when she needed to go to the bathroom we'd remind her that the red button was to get help and have her push it. But the deeper problem was not only could she not remember the call button, she couldn't remember that she could not bear weight on her leg. Out conversations went like this:

Me: Here, Mom, press the red button pinned right here where you can reach it.
Ma: (pushes button) Well why can't you just take me to the bathroom? It is right there!
Me: Because it takes two people to help you out of your wheelchair, and their insurance insists it has to be trained people.
Ma: Oh that is ridiculous! I can walk into the bathroom if you just get me to the door.

Sometimes the response would be very quick, but often it was not. (It was never "hours.") I would remind Ma that she had disposable undies on so if she did leak a little while waiting it wouldn't be a big problem. She'd look surprised, put her hand inside the top of her pants, and confirm she did have disposables.

The problem you face is common but that does not make it less serious. I'd start by talking to the facility staff and get their suggestions for how to minimize this.
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I've tried all the answers the two of you came up with thank you , Mom does have a call button by her bed she can't remember it's there and / or how to use it it's just becoming a big problem. i'm planning on talking to the facility Director later to see if we can figure something out that'll work better
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Ms Madge,

I would check the no button thing with the state. I would think this was a law. Mom had one next to her bed and in the bathroom.

My Mom was in an AL for eight months. She fell 4x in 4 months. She went down hill a little every month. Not the AL fault just the desease. Now she is in LT, my daughter (an RN in a rehab/NH unit) feels maybe we should have placed her in LT from the start. Daughter is now working for an AL. ALs are not set up for extensive care. Some will keep a patient longer than they should, this is what my daughter is now seeing. If Mom is falling on a regular basis maybe she needs more care.
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I forgot to mention that I requested a baby monitor be placed on mom's nightstand

Of course I've found it unplugged many a time and if the other end is not plugged in at the nurses room or if no one is in the nurses room- well you get the picture 

I have bells on her walker and a butler bell on her nightstand but her best defense is her voice - my Viking can still roar 

You could ask for a bed alarm but again if no one hears it and responds....
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Sissy,
Must be hot out your way

Is mom actually able to call for help somehow ?

My mom fell badly in the first month in memory care - there are no call buttons and her room is at the end of the hall
Aides check the rooms maybe once or twice during the night and so I've had an overnight caregiver with mom ever since as she gets up quite a bit during the night
She's had at least 4 falls there and no longer walks except a short distance with a lot of effort

Folks fall all the time at her facility - they lose motor skills or forget their walker - or they're pushed by another resident

What does mom's facility say ?
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Have her checked for a UTI! When my Mom starts falling with some added confusion I know she has a UTI.

Then get her on a routine of a strong probiotic, cranberry juice and pills, and D-Mannose. Mom's UTI's have gone away with this combination (she's 82).
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