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My Husband did that.
Often it was a fairly quiet moan but if he got excited or if I was on the phone it would get louder. Almost like he wanted to join in on the conversation. (My Husband was pretty much non verbal the last 8 years of his life, he maybe spoke 1 or 2 words, rarely a sentence.)
I do not like anything in my ears but I did use earplugs once or twice.
I had headphones that would pick up TV sounds so I could watch TV and hear what was going on. But I did not like the headphones and resorted to using the CC on the TV (closed caption)
I did tell myself that I would miss that noise when he was gone. (and I sometimes do) I know the feeling is a bit different in your case being a MIL and not a spouse.
You can't get it to stop, or at least completely.
There are medications that help with anxiety that might help.
If it gets real loud, leave the room. As long as it is safe to do so.
If you can wear earbuds, headphones do so, again as long as it is safe.
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Per your profile, your MIL is 91 years old. Can she still enjoy a piece of chewing gum or a hard candy? Will those pose a choking hazard? Or too hard on her teeth and jaw? If not, you can try those to keep her mouth busy, so that she will not moan.

Are there activities that distract her from moaning? Such as watching TV or listening to music?

I'm just throwing out suggestions. Hope you find some ways that will help.
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Luta65 Nov 2022
polarbear,

Good and helpful suggestions but likely, as you suggested, candy, etc. would pose too much of a choking hazard.

This is a tough one and most of us would find it unbearable while wondering if there is pain or anything that we can work toward alleviating. I think it's likely just the broken brain's need for stimulus and self-generated as distraction from the loss of other physical and neuro-sensory input. The human brain is so very complex and when broken, almost impossible to discern.
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91 years old with alzheimer's / dementia, broken hip, depression, hearing loss, incontinence, and mobility problems.

For no reason?

The moaning is a kind of self-soothing, would be my guess. How about a twiddle blanket or a comfort blanket, have you tried anything like that?
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AlvaDeer Nov 2022
I so think you could be correct. We see this and repetitive body movement such as rocking all the time in caring for dementia patients.
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This from the internet:
"Nearly all disruptive vocalizations are related to a form of brain injury; most have dementia due to Alzheimer's disease or cerebrovascular disease [ 2, 3 ]. In susceptible persons, vocalizations can be triggered by a variety of stimuli, including the physical environment, stress, anxiety, or caregiver behaviors [ 5 ]."

We aren't even on the cusp of learning what goes on in our poor brains, and especially as they descend into dementia. But this is very common. The verbalizations and even chewing motion, etc. are so common and there honestly is no way of controlling it. I would discuss with her MD. Sometimes very low level doses of anti-depressants can have some effect on repetitive behaviors. This has to be so distressing to you and I am so sorry.
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I stopped in the store once, a child and her mom were walking next to us and the little girl asked her mom "Why is that man making sad noises" Her mom sort of tugged at her arm sort of to shush her. I said " He is not sad. His brain does not work as well as yours or mine. Do you have friends in school that have Autism?" When she nodded I said "Do they make noises or hold onto something to help them in class?" and she nodded. I said "He does the same thing, he has Alzheimer's and and this is the way he calms himself. So he is not sad, thank you for being concerned".

So I am sure the noises are self soothing.
Watch for other cues for pain.
Grimace, wincing, resisting a movement sometimes, a change in the moaning if you try to move her, rubbing an area or guarding an area.
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