My dad lives at home with Mom. He says the puzzles are just too hard for him now. He enjoys reading and watching travel shows. What other individual activities at home do you recommend? Mom and dad prefer not to go out.
500 piece puzzles are pretty big and can be challenging. Look for smaller ones and maybe do them together with him. 100 piece?
Does he play any card games? Board games? I find that conversation can be hard with my mom with dementia so we play mexican train dominoes. I have to prompt her a lot throughout the game but she can do it since it's basically matching. She can also play uno. And Racko.
I just saw pics of seniors doing this at a small facility… the toddler shape matching cards where you place the foam shapes on top of the printed shapes on a card.
Simple card games like "war" are good (just pick a card each from pile and see which is higher). Also, find-a-word puzzles were easier for my mom when she couldn't do crosswords anymore. Or, a short walk or sit outside!
Couldn't edit my post... If your dad starts chewing on any toys or games you get take them away. Then you start looking for infant/toddler teething toys
Smaller puzzles You can take a family photo and have it made into a puzzle any number of pieces. If he likes travel get puzzles with pictures that he has been to or waned to go to.
Try card games. Keep them simple like Uno, Crazy eights (pretty much the same as Uno but with a regular deck) Try Jenga Duplo blocks (infant/toddler version of Lego blocks) easy to put together and stack. Building blocks Magnaform (plastic pieces that are magnetic and stick to each other you can build different shapes with them
Downsize your expectations. My husband would have been 91 today. He died 3 months ago and was still baking almost to the end. He quit doing sudoku awhile back but he would still do easy crosswords. Harry and I played gin for years. Get creative. Harry asked me at the end if I had any laundry to fold. He was my energizer bunny. He got fast acting leukemia at the very end. And I lost him abruptly. He could be gone so quick. So tell him how much you love him today because you may not be able to tell him tomorrow.
Sadly, with Alzheimers and other forms of dementia, the condition usually gets worse over time. It's harder for those who have it to concentrate, remember and figure things out. You have to take one day at a time with him, and help him take one day at a time. Let him lead the way to decide which activities to do. Be thankful he can still read. Take him for a walk, if he's able. He might be able to do puzzles with few pieces (like the ones for children). While he's still able to sign legal papers, make sure that all of his paperwork is in order, in the case that he might become incapacitated. He (and your mother) should set up powers of attorney for medical (also called health care proxy) and financial matters (durable power of attorney). They both need wills and living wills with their advance medical directives. Social Security/Medicare also have their own forms to allow others to speak on their behalf, as do banks and other financial institutions (insurance, credit cards, etc.). My mother made it very easy for me by letting me get a credit card on her account with my name on it so that I could purchase things for her. All the best to all of you.
Please let your father lead with his preferences , as long as he and your mother are safe. It is not unexpected for ill patients, especially Alzheimer's pts to have a change in interests; puzzles will present more cognitive challenges hence, it is normal that he will not find the same interest .
Honor his " patient rights" to choose and make choices for himself within the realm of safety. It will be help to him if you affirm him, his choices ( as long as safe).
Remember, dear, that family members have loving and caring intentions when wanting their parent to " do more" or engage in activities; often one has to ask oneself if this is to help the caregiver ( you) or for the pt ? No one enjoys watching decline and, offering other " activities" is a kind, living thing but do it with preparation for the patient to say yes or no. Do not increase or nor your anxiety by continuing to push activities that they are refusing.
Spending time just being present with your father and mother is most important. listening in their space, maybe watch a TV program or their favorite movie with them ; it is also a way to be kind to yourself and not feel like you must be " doing" all the time. And, be as prayers possible, for when their present preference for TV may change or attention span becomes more limited or maybe fall asleep.
If there are hands-on toys or activities that require less focus and concentration, he might still do those. Maybe something quite different from puzzles altogether.
As his disease progresses his loss of short-term memory will impact his ability to keep himself on task and therefore, entertained.
Maybe more physical busywork is now better: - pairing items (like nuts and bolts of various sizes -- lots of them so it keeps him busy and also burns his energy so he sleeps better at night) - folding "laundry" (this is a dedicated basket of items that will need to get unfolded by your Mom) - Duplo blocks: have him follow a simple pattern for him to build) - sorting and pairing colorful socks... poker chips, playing cards - cutting old towels and t-shirts into rags (you can go onto Nextdoor.com and request the old shirts for free... every on can use nice cotton rags!) - clipping coupons from newspapers and flyers (which can be given out to relatives and neighbors)
... you get the idea. I wish you all the best on this journey with him!
It’s the progression of the disease. My husband went from 1000p to 500p to 100p to 50p to 25p to 20p to 0p in the span of 3 yrs. Now he is bedridden and dependent on others 24/7. Dementia is a disease that always wins at the end. It is horrible.
I used to watch a friend and helped her with puzzles when her DH needed some short trips. Take a 300 piece puzzle for one last try. Divide it in thirds and place pieces in baggies. Once the top 3rd was completed we would open up the next bag with the bottom then opened the middle bag
Good idea. But I got confused at first (oh, dear). So you have to finish the puzzle yourself before you divide it up, LOL. I took a moment to figure out how the baggies would help otherwise. ;)
My mother always enjoyed word search books as a casual hobby. But after her hospital fiasco in 2021, she became a word search super star.. I'm baffled by her brain sometimes
Are you asking us to guess why he CANNOT do them, or why he doesn't WISH to, or why he would like to is unable to?
My own guess is that he is unable to do the puzzles now.
Have you spoken with your Dad? I don't know what stage he is at but my brother was able to speak with me about his Lewy's, about his symptoms, and about "his world" for want of a better word. Try speaking with him about it.
A fellow resident at my brother's ALF cottage enjoyed dominos, not to play a real game, but the matching up. He was also drawn to the scrabble board and putting together simple words with the tiles. My brother loved those glossy big books of old cars and could sit and look at them by the hour. He was more early stage. Good luck finding something for your Dad.
Thank you for taking time to respond to my unclear question. It was my very first post. Dominoes sounds like a great idea. And you are right, I need to have conversations with him about his world.
It's not that your dad "no longer wants to do jigsaw puzzles," it's now because he can't figure out how to do them as his brain is broken. It's hard to witness the mental decline of our loved ones with this horrible disease this I know. Does your dad go to an Adult Daycare Center at all? They plan great activities for folks with dementia, and feed them breakfast, lunch and a snack. That's just a thought. Whatever you find now for your dad to do, it must be simple. Music is always a great go to. I wish you the best in figuring out how to keep your dad occupied.
It may be too difficult for him to do them now . Perhaps there is something else he would like to do ? Does he like to listen to music ? You could make a playlist for him. Does he like to read ? My FIL with dementia is struggling with crossword puzzles , rarely does them anymore but he still reads . He also plays solitaire on his tablet but isn’t doing it as often . There are so many easy games you could try if he uses a tablet or IPad . Maybe others will have other suggestions .
When my mother had dementia , as it got worse, she was content sitting by the front door of her assisted living facility people watching , to see who came and went . Their world gets small and they don’t need much .
Does he play any card games? Board games? I find that conversation can be hard with my mom with dementia so we play mexican train dominoes. I have to prompt her a lot throughout the game but she can do it since it's basically matching. She can also play uno. And Racko.
Good luck.
Paint by numbers is another fun activity or adult coloring books.
I am 76 I use to be an avid miniaturist, for like 30 years, my eyes are not what they were and my patience, well that has waned. I am over it.
Let him do what he wants, if it is nothing, then so be it.
Don't pin your expectations on him, he is old and tired and has more than enough to deal with.
If your dad starts chewing on any toys or games you get take them away. Then you start looking for infant/toddler teething toys
You can take a family photo and have it made into a puzzle any number of pieces.
If he likes travel get puzzles with pictures that he has been to or waned to go to.
Try card games. Keep them simple like Uno, Crazy eights (pretty much the same as Uno but with a regular deck)
Try Jenga
Duplo blocks (infant/toddler version of Lego blocks) easy to put together and stack.
Building blocks
Magnaform (plastic pieces that are magnetic and stick to each other you can build different shapes with them
Honor his " patient rights" to choose and make choices for himself within the realm of safety. It will be help to him if you affirm him, his choices ( as long as safe).
Remember, dear, that family members have loving and caring intentions when wanting their parent to " do more" or engage in activities; often one has to ask oneself if this is to help the caregiver ( you) or for the pt ? No one enjoys watching decline and, offering other
" activities" is a kind, living thing but do it with preparation for the patient to say yes or no. Do not increase or nor your anxiety by continuing to push activities that they are refusing.
Spending time just being present with your father and mother is most important. listening in their space, maybe watch a TV program or their favorite movie with them ; it is also a way to be kind to yourself and not feel like you must be " doing" all the time. And, be as prayers possible, for when their present preference for TV may change or attention span becomes more limited or maybe fall asleep.
Practice good self care !
Maybe more physical busywork is now better:
- pairing items (like nuts and bolts of various sizes -- lots of them so it keeps him busy and also burns his energy so he sleeps better at night)
- folding "laundry" (this is a dedicated basket of items that will need to get unfolded by your Mom)
- Duplo blocks: have him follow a simple pattern for him to build)
- sorting and pairing colorful socks... poker chips, playing cards
- cutting old towels and t-shirts into rags (you can go onto Nextdoor.com and request the old shirts for free... every on can use nice cotton rags!)
- clipping coupons from newspapers and flyers (which can be given out to relatives and neighbors)
... you get the idea. I wish you all the best on this journey with him!
My own guess is that he is unable to do the puzzles now.
Have you spoken with your Dad? I don't know what stage he is at but my brother was able to speak with me about his Lewy's, about his symptoms, and about "his world" for want of a better word. Try speaking with him about it.
A fellow resident at my brother's ALF cottage enjoyed dominos, not to play a real game, but the matching up. He was also drawn to the scrabble board and putting together simple words with the tiles. My brother loved those glossy big books of old cars and could sit and look at them by the hour. He was more early stage. Good luck finding something for your Dad.
It's hard to witness the mental decline of our loved ones with this horrible disease this I know.
Does your dad go to an Adult Daycare Center at all? They plan great activities for folks with dementia, and feed them breakfast, lunch and a snack. That's just a thought.
Whatever you find now for your dad to do, it must be simple. Music is always a great go to.
I wish you the best in figuring out how to keep your dad occupied.
When my mother had dementia , as it got worse, she was content sitting by the front door of her assisted living facility people watching , to see who came and went . Their world gets small and they don’t need much .