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My wife is my mom, I'm her significan other, confused who my kids are. I don't think she knows she has dementia. I can't interact with my family or anyone else especially females or it starts her down angry jealous path. It's hard to get back calm. What should I do?? She asks me questions about who I've dated or how many kids do I have.


Will I leave her for someone else? overwhelmed....can't leave my sight or she falls apart.....wants only me and her around.

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The problem is probably two-fold: 1. your mother's grip on where she is in time has slid; 2. you now look the living spit-and-image of your father thirty years ago.

You can verify the latter by comparing photographs. For example, I have a photograph in my desk that could be of my father, my brother or my son and I genuinely can't tell which.

Your profile states that your mother is living with you. Is it just the two of you, or is there any other family?
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Welcome!

Can you give us a little background on how mom came to be living with you after being in a facility? Was there any thought that perhaps she should remain there as a long term care patient?

You should know that Urinary Tract Infections can cause these sorts of symptoms. If this is new confusion, you need to call moms doctor and report it right away. A UTI test should be done first and foremost.

When my mom first developed dementia, we found that adding a geriatric psychiatrist to her care team was a smart move. The right combination of meds can very much help with the agitation and anxiety that often accompanies dementia.
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We have the same problem in our home with my MIL. We brought her home to live with us from an assisted living which she shared with my FIL, after he passed away. After being here for a few weeks, she started to confuse her son, my husband, as being her deceased husband. Very confrontational with me, accusing him of cheating on her, because she sees us doing the little things, holding hands, helping me around the house, kiss goodbye, etc and she explodes. She will come into our room in the middle of the night, see us sleeping and she starts swearing at us, using words we had no idea she would ever utter in her lifetime. It has been an extremely stressful situation for her as well as us.
A change in medication has helped somewhat, but we still feel that it probably wasn't the right decision to bring her into our home, a more intimate setting, than being in an assisted living. We are actively pursing finding another place to care for her in the hopes that being back in that type setting will also bring back her
awareness of who we are, or more importantly who we aren't.
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