She can't take care of herself! Fell a more than once,want take he meds and current in the hospital. I live in GA. There are 5 other siblings live in the same town. But because she has made at that stage she wants listen to them they want go every day to check on her. Ever time she gets sick and goes into the hospital and the doctors states she need to be in a nursing home,the always tell the doctors that they will go every day and make sure someone is there with her, because they don't want her mad at them. And there is one sister that's have a medical power of attorney. BUT if she try to use it she knows my mom want speak to her anymore. I have told them on in numerous time we should have a family meeting with the doctors to get her out her before something bad happens. BUT no seems to care,they just in there feeling. Need some advice, because I work in the medical field for 22yrs. I can see the good and the bad of this.
So the bit about the POA being “afraid to act because mom won’t talk to her” might be true, but the POA powers aren’t even active yet, Unless there’s more to the story.
Also: Chronic kidney disease stage four is potentially nearing dialysis, but it doesn’t mean let someone needs dialysis yet. Could stay that way for years.
My POA brother is an officer in the army and he believes everything mom tells him. I planted all her flowers, she tells him she did it and I wasn't even there that day and he believes her.
Honestly, I have no advice for you , I'm sorry, hopefully others will , have better advice .
We are both going through the same thing. I think we have to take it one day at a time.
Best of luck to you
Honestly, be glad you live farther away so that you're not sucked into this unproductive vortex of exhausting activity and cycle of fall/ER/hospital/rehab/home rinse, repeat. Been there, done that with my own relative.
At some point in the near future she will have a life-ending fall or medical incident. Maybe consider going to visit her now while she's alive and knows you rather than at her funeral. Go with no expectations to argue about how she's now choosing to live. Just go and visit with your Mom and enjoy her before you can't.
Your mother is now 95. She is at the end of her life.
If something happens now, your mother will have "done it her way" and stayed in her own home.
I would take comfort in that.
I doubt she would live a lot longer if removed from what she loves and put into care.
There is often, at the end of life a case of quality versus quantity of life. Your mother would like vote for quality.
If you truly wish to pursue this you can call APS with your story, accuse the POA of neglect, ask for wellness checks and that a case be opened for removal of POA and placement for mother in safe care. Where the outcome will likely be the same as had you done nothing. As I said, your mom is 95. She is currently doing it "her way" if unsafely.
I have no easy certain answer for you. Just some things to think upon.
Good luck.