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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
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VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Hi Countrymouse and everyone. Thank you for your concern and feedback. It has been a lot of back and forth. I am not sure why she was avoiding everyone. It did cause a bit of anxiety but at least there is a plan in progress.
Your poor SIL was probably going through the mill trying to make that decision, perhaps that's why she couldn't face anyone for the time being do you think? I'm glad communication is back on track now, and hope there will be a good outcome for everybody. Please let us know how it goes. Are you okay?
Hi. Thank everyone for their comments. My SIL was avoiding family and social work at the facility. She finally was transparent and stated she could not take care of her husband. The facility is working on placing him. I know abandon is a strong word but I was concerned why she was not forthright with anyone. It is a lot to care for someone.
Yes, rehab is temporary. Medicare only pays 100 percent the first 20days and only 50percent the next 80. After that its private pay. Maybe SIL has made plans to transfer him to LTC after rehab.
Also, he can't stay in any sort of rehab indefinitely, can he, by definition; so this is necessarily a temporary situation. Would you like to say a little more about what your brother's care needs are and what you think ought to be happening?
Often on AC you will see many of us recommend for a caregiver refuse to bring a loved one home. This is in cases where the care necessary for the loved one has become too difficult for us to do and is impacting our own health and lives. It is a very difficult decision to make. But, we cannot care for others unless we care for ourselves first.
What are your brothers health issues? Are there funds available to hire assistance for your SIL to provide care at home? How is SIL's health? What other responsibilities does she have? What help is in place? Do other family members offer help and support to SIL?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Maybe she thought it was her responsibility to care for him but knew she knew she wouldn't be able to handle it.
Maybe she was feeling guilty for needing to put her husband in a nursing home.
Maybe she felt his family would hate her or, at the very least, look down on her. (Look at your choice of words as her SIL-"abandon".)
Maybe she needed to gather options and vent to her family, friends or others about what she should do.
Everyone has their own way of handling situations. Thankfully she opened up.
What are your brothers health issues? Are there funds available to hire assistance for your SIL to provide care at home? How is SIL's health? What other responsibilities does she have? What help is in place? Do other family members offer help and support to SIL?
Does she feel unable to care for him at home? Is she working with the facility to find long term care for him?