My wife has problems getting to sleep at night. It doesn't matter what time I put her to bed, it takes at least an hour for her to go to sleep. Any suggestions?

Have you tried tucking her in?

Read to her. Let her listen to the radio until she drifts off. Meditative tapes or sounds on a tablet at the bedside until she drifts off. Some like the low hum of the TV on in the room. Up to you just to try some different things, and hope you will find some that might work. Podcasts put me out like a light! Especially Esther Perel counseling couples on her Where Shall We Begin.

Has this been discussed with her doctor? Is this a long term behavior of hers, not the sitting on the side of the bed, but the taking a while to fall asleep? If so, some people simply aren’t good sleepers. But I’d discuss this with her doctor and see if there’s a good solution there

Brown noise on an Echo Dot is soothing. It can be set to turn off when you like; for instance, in 30 minutes.

Some people don’t drift off to sleep immediately. When she does fall asleep, does she sleep all night?

Try playing soft music or a podcast for her. You can find podcasts on just about every topic! Find something interesting that you think she would enjoy relaxing with.

Sleep issues are common with Alzheimer's and dementia. Here is a link to some tips to use to get your wife into a better sleep habit in general:

https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/6-tips-managing-sleep-problems-alzheimers#:~:text=Set%20a%20quiet%2C%20peaceful%20mood,out%20loud%2C%20also%20may%20help.

Perry: if you haven't already done so, check out this URL for someone asking the same question. It's recent and there's some good ideas:
https://www.agingcare.com/questions/i-often-go-days-on-only-3-hours-of-sleep-at-night-due-to-stress-of-caring-for-mom-moods-are-everywhe-481480.htm?orderby=recent
I'm going through the same problem myself, too. I never had problems until the last year getting to sleep, and I've just dropped off with a doctor info on Melatonin (recommended by my PCP) and some of the Sleepy Time Teas (Celestial Seasoning). Some people swear by them here but you have to check out the box information. The "regular" one doesn't have too many "warnings," but there's a whole new line of "Extra" Sleepy Time teas I discovered in my grocery store just recently. That line definitely says to check out the ingredients with your MD on the box.
How sad to hear about Monsieur Bourdain's death possibly being brought about by Ambien. He was one of a kind. When Ambien first came out on the market, a relative who then knew a lot more about prescription drugs than I did, recounted some very bad stories, such as a woman taking it who got up from sitting down, fell down and broke her leg.
Good luck! Not getting enough sleep is really a bad situation, as it impedes clear thinking, in addition to other things.

i have tried all of the relies and none seem to work. I was thinking about asking her PCP to perscribe a mild seditive,

Perry I don't have any mental decline and am only 63 years old, and it doesn't matter what time I go to bed, it still takes me a good hour to an hour and a half(sometimes longer)to fall asleep as well. I think that's probably most people.
I like to watch some TV before I fall asleep, but I'm not sitting up when I'm watching it, I'm lying down.
Have you tried lying her down and turning on the TV, or her favorite music, podcast etc.?
Not everyone is like my late husband who was out like a light within minutes of hitting the pillow. I think he was the exception not the rule.

Have you tried melatonin for her?

i take baclofen during the day for spasms, 5mg and 10 in the evening. i had a stroke and i have been in a wheelchair, so it helps me sleep too as well as spasms.

Does she look at any electronics, (tv, smartphone, laptop) before bed or even taking small naps during the day?

2.5 mg of Valium and Flents ear plugs - try a cup of camomile tea - could be anxieties - there are calming apps and soothing story telling apps that make people feel peaceful - go on Instagram- green noise helps me . Calm - Aura are the names of the apps .

I am not a professional. I use a product called Midnight. It is OTC. Have been using it for YEARS. A pediatrician (a long time ago) even said it was OK for a 6 year-old grandchild to use. It’s lemon balm which is a bush I have even seen growing in the mountains of New York. The owner of that plant used it for a calming tea. There are two other herbs and in Midnight. It can be taken just before bed, one or two. Or (and this is the best part) it can be taken if a person wakes up in the middle of the night and can’t go back to sleep. In that case, just take it before 4am. There is no side effect that I have ever noticed the next morning. Now what is your wife doing in the last hour before bedtime? Watching TV or other electronic is not recommended. The best thing is a good book to read or some slow monotone voice on YouTube. Maybe she would like for you to just sit with her. Develop a consistent time and ritual. Follow the time and ritual. If the first time and ritual does not work, try another one. If she has always had trouble going to sleep, it is not likely to change now. Midnight works. No need for water; it is a chewable. It also matters what she had for dinner. Spicy food for example. Or eating dinner too late or too early in the evening. A cup of warm milk can be part of the ritual. I currently eat cottage cheese with pear because then I don’t wake up hungry in the middle of the night. This is just one person’s experience. Does her doctor or PCP say there is anything (medication) contributing to this problem? If so, can the med be changed? Is she worrying about something? Is she in pain? Walking outside in the evening and/or walking beside water (“He maketh me lie down beside still waters…”) . Also some people are helped by a “noise machine” which makes white noise and several other choices. Birds singing is very relaxing for some. Is the bedroom too hot? Daytime naps are not helpful either! This is a problem that can be solved. Good luck.

First: what a caring man you are. Now. Has your wife always had problems with falling asleep 😴. And, does she sleep once she does fall asleep? Let me say this, I have long term insomnia. It takes me at least an hour to fall asleep, then it's hard to stay asleep. I even take clonazapam before bedtime. Years ago I stopped sleeping in the same room with my husband as he not only snores , but lucky him falls asleep in secs.
Do you snore? Not many can sleep with a spouse that does.
Lack of sleep over time had caused heart disease at least part of my health problems.
Is your wife mentally alert?
If so she may have her own wishes as far as sleep. Again. You are a good man, not all husband's care ( mine)

My husband uses Melatonin and our son uses a box fan for the constant hum.

See if you can have her view early morning sunlight, within an hour of waking up, for at least 10-20 minutes. Seeing light at sundown also helps with circadian rhythms (and can help offset the effect of indoor lighting after dark). Dim all the lights in the evening to the lowest that you can (your eyes will adjust even if it seems too dark at first), avoid any overhead lights. Make sure you have blue light blockers/glasses for the evening (not during the day). Make the bedroom fairly cold, try a warm bath before bed (which can help lower body temperature) and have a nighttime routine in the hour before bed.

I don't have any solutions. However, a caregiver at my Mom's MC found an ingenious solution for my mother who has moderate dementia and hard of hearing.

Make picture books (maybe one of your children can build it). Make it small and lightweight. (My niece had several built through an online service and Costco.) Have it contain pictures of friends, relatives, you, your children and grandchildren doing things or happy places. Do not change out the pictures. Just build new books. Before getting to bed, let her thumb through the book or books. Have at least 3 or 4 books. No captions on the pictures needed for her. Maybe captions for you so that you can identify the people.

The books help my Mom to relax. Looking at the picture books becomes part of the routine prior to bedtime.

Then, they tuck her in and she is content.

I take magnesium at night, some studies suggest it helps with sleep, but, as it is with all supplements ask GP about interacting with meds. Along with some foods/ snacks rich in magnesium like cashews, peanuts, or now I love PB. And cup or two of camomile tea.

Light Classical Music has proven to be very conducive, loud enough to be heard, but low enough not to interfere or jolt the person awake. Apple has recently released their Classical Music App. SiriusXM has one channel. Apparently music, as much, if not more than reading, promotes the desire to sleep. Of course, no rowdy tunes, and preferably wordless. God Bless and Best Wishes!

I’ve been using a noise machine for years. I only use the beach wave setting . Very relaxing .

My daughter listens to different ASMR recordings of repetitive sounds. You can google ….ASMR for sleep . YouTube and other sites have them , you could play them on a tablet next to her.

Perry0912: Perhaps the fact that "she just sits on the side of the bed" is prohibiting sleep. Put her IN the bed and insist that she stay there; perchance you could try a sleep patch, called Zleep.

Disclaimer: This is not an ad for the product since advertising is not permitted here on the forum.

Create a bed time routine to help her to relax and get ready to sleep. Also, get used to it taking an hour for her to finally fall asleep. If she seems to have problems falling asleep, consider if she is napping during the day which robs her of "night sleep" or if she is taking in food/beverages with caffeine or other stimulants. After considering all of these factors, a doctor can prescribe a mild sleep medication.

I use CBD gummies. They are wonderful. I sleep all night and wake up refreshed in the morning. I’m 82.