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I do not want to be involved in their financial schemes or scams. The most recent being that she, (mother) wants my husband to sign a form for my Dad's Medicaid trust stating that he, my husband provides lawn care services for her for X amount of dollars a month when actually all he does is drive her grandson up to her place and the grandson does the actually mowing. She also insists on making out the checks in my husbands name instead of to the grandchild doing the mowing or paying the young man cash,

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Lol, "...my mother thinks POA'S are man-things. .." you win the AC prize for the day!
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Ake, no you cannot be named as a POA without your knowledge or consent as you would need to sign that legal document saying you were accepting this position as Power of Attorney.
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Yes, a person can be named as POA or healthcare proxy without their knowledge or consent. That would be a pretty stupid thing to do, in my opinion, but but when I did the POA documents (with the assistance of an Elder Law attorney) none of the people named had to sign anything. I just named them. Nothing was sent to them officially. (I talked to them, of course, but I was not required to.)

But a named person can refuse to serve. If you get wind that your in-laws have named your husband to any role he does not wish to fill. notify them by registered mail. If he is ever called upon to make some decisions to take some action as a POA he can simply decline.

malloryg8r and freqflyer, where do you live? I wonder if some states require signatures and/or notifications of persons named. This state sure doesn't!
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Well, yes your mom could name you, or nominate you, but if you didn't want to serve then you would need to return this document to your mom and/or her lawyer, unsigned, and enclose a cover letter stating you will not.sign the document (but do sign your cover letter). Send it certified mail, return receipt, and save a copy. You could even have that letter notarized to make.it seem extra-official if you like. But
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The state of Massachusetts does not require the DPOA Agent to sign the instrument.
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As a related bit of information...you can be *removed* as Power of Attorney POA without notifying you; it happened to me. The documents said they had to notify me but the attorney and my mother did not notify me about the change. I found out when my mother summoned me to deal with a huge mess she had. After I explained that she had appointed her ditzy sister as POA and I was unable to help her, she changed her mind and reinstated me as POA. So POA assignment is sort of a nightmare of responsibilities and emotions subject to change without notice. I would think you need to insist someone else assume all the responsibilities, someone who will get paid for their services.
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Jeanne, good point, now I wonder if each State is different when it comes to drawing up a Power of Attorney, from what I am reading above. My parents Power of Attorney was done with an Elder Law Attorney, my parents and I had to sign said document,it was witnessed and it was Notarized.... this was done 6 months ago. I live in the Commonwealth of Virginia.

Now on my own POA, my sig other was named as my POA and he had to sign, but the other back-up names didn't need to sign.
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The answer is no. The POA doc has to be notarized. You must be present for the notary public to complete the process.
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....But make sure you do respond specifically and promptly.
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Some places attach a form to the POA that is directed to the POA to sign as accepting the position if need be. However, not everyone does that. I would make sure to alert my parents that I was NOT interested, just so they know. It would go to the alternate if you decline to accept it.
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