Dad is 77. COPD 2 heart attacks and kidney disease. He has occupational therapy and physical therapy come in 3 times a week and hates it. I’m sure he would refuse it but my sister and I have told him he has to. He has no interest in doing anything. He sits in recliner all day watching tv. Only stands up to urinate in urinal then sets it to the side for me or sister to empty and clean. He can walk. He has a walker and just recently spent 2 weeks at rehab for help walking. My stepmom passed away a year ago and dad fell while she was in hospital so he ended up in hospital too. Tried rehab then but after 3 days he refused and was sent home. Since then my sister and I have spent every day with him as we trade weeks. He can walk. He can go to toilet. He can get his already sorted medicine out of holder. He can get drink and heat up food. He is alone while we work and only does what he absolutely has to. If we are at home he does nothing. He expects food served to him and will call you from another room to get him drink. He’s not helpless just lazy and thinks he deserves this treatment. We are at wits end on what to do as we both hate staying with him but he has no one else. No family. No friends. Neighbors are not fond of him because of his treatment of stepmom. He makes no effort to socialize or help himself. Just wants to be waited on by somebody. I think it’s time for a nursing home but he would be self pay and refuses. Any advice?
Decide what you are WILLING to do - not feel obligated to do. Then inform him that you will do X and will no longer do Y.
This is up to him to figure out now.