Nervous about trying in home caregivers. Advice anyone?

We used aging care.com, interviewed a few in person and decided that we did not need a nursing degree to prepare sandwiches or drive to appointments so the other caregiver agency helps with long-term care applications. The first person they sent out drag him around the grocery store doing her own shopping, washed one load Of laundry and heated up a frozen meal that he could do himself. She was asked to dust but did not. Upon my complaint I’m not certain she has a job anymore but to me... dragging a 91 yr old man around BelAir while recovering from knee surgery and sepsis is all wrong, especially given he came home with bananas and a bag of prescriptions. They refunded us immediately and the 2nd caregiver has been a perfect fit. She keeps herself busy, watering plants, vacuuming, wiping bathrooms and standing by during showers, etc. She’s 60, even speaks a bit of Japanese so they get along very well, and keeps him informed of what she’s doing so he doesn’t feel uncomfortable with someone roaming around his home. I keep a list of small chores for her and she keeps me in the know of anything he needs. We are very fortunate to find such a great fit.
i suggest you put off date nights until you find one that’s self motivated and respects your home and your mom likes or even enjoys. . It may take one or 5 but you’ll learn as you go as well. Clorox wipes instead of pure bleach, for instance. Small lists of chores done each visit vs once a week. There are very good ones out there. If your mom is able to give feedback that’s the most helpful in deciding. They are not slaves nor should they be treated as such but small things to keep them busy will make the team a well oiled machine. Be realistic, 4 hours can go slow if everything is done so companion care is a fallback, playing cards, reorganizing drawers, chatting about common interests is fine too. I have mine take him to store and prepare 3 days of sandwiches or lunches each visit , you get the point.

Keep trying to find someone that will do it with a shorter shift. Ask around. I mean ask everyone you run into. That's what we did. A nurse gave us a lead to someone that would be willing to do an hour shift between her other shifts.

As for learning to trust them, you just have to take time and learn to trust them. Start out by being at home at the same time. See if it works out. If it does then go from there.

Hi, first and foremost, when going through any agency, you can be assured that any caregiver they send to you, is thoroughly trained to handle any situation, they have had a very detailed background check, and some, if not all ,bond their caregivers. I am a caregiver, and outside of bonded at work, I carry private insurance, and I'm bonded via that. Never had to use it, but it's a huge piece of mind. Why not have the potential caregiver come to your home, spend some time with Mom, doesn't have to be a long visit. Reason; Seniors seem to develop the ability to "pick up vibes" off others. Mom will know if she and you can "have faith" - be comfortable with the caregiver. This works great for me. I do it on my own time, but when it's time to get in caregiver mode, my senior feels she knows me. Simply because of a brief, relaxed visit. If the caregiver can't be trusted, she would not be working via an agency. GOOD LUCK..!!

Go through a physician or insurance company who have more resources to screen caregivers than you may have, then have a face to face interview with the helper and make a plan/contract. Good luck.