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she has COPD, IBSD and was in hospital last year with double pneumonia for a month

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Go to the primary care doctor, and they have the legal documents to sign. It has to be in agreement with the doctor, or any sort of medical staff that you guys come into contact with cannot legally stop treatment..
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Hello KatME13,

Below is an article written by one of our experts that I think you may find helpful.

https://www.agingcare.com/articles/Hospice-and-Palliative-Care-Helping-People-Die-96209.htm

I wish you the best,
The AgingCare.com Team
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