My mother who has Alzheimers has been living with us for the last 3 months after living in a nursing home for 2 years. She was on private pay to the tune of over $7000 a month for those 2 years. Now that her money is exhausted and her home has been sold, Medicaid has denied her claim which is why she is living with us. We are giving it our best, she is in adult day care 3 days a week, but even with that it is completely overhwelming with her becoming beligerant and more needy each day. We seldom get a good nights sleep, run our own business, have other family issues, not to mention we have lost all privacy and our own connectedness. My question is is there a type of nursing facility that takes people who have just their retirement and pension as their only income? Are there state facilities? I cannot imagine us being able to keep this up indefinitely especially seeing the needs and limitations getting more and more.
I understand where you are coming from. I haven't slept with my husband in over 2 years. I rarely see my kids, I get about 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night and I am taking care of Mom from the minute my feet hit the floor to when I hit the pillow.
If you are active in church you might be able to rally some volunteers to help. My Mom is very picky and refuses most of the help that has been offered.
See if she qualifies for Hospice. They've been great. We have an aide that comes in daily to bathe Mom, the nurse comes once a week, and they pay for most of her medications (through Medicare). They provide her O2, medical devices and a social worker at least once a month. They don't provide the daily care that is needed, but we found a great caregiver that we pay out of pocket. She comes in daily so I can go to work. We have gone through about 10 caregivers, so be very careful, as we have had things stolen, mom was not cared for properly, but we finally found a great one!
Good luck to you and we are here for you!