Follow
Share
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
When the Surgeon told us, "do whatever you wanted to do....NOW."
He was gone in exactly one year, after Stage 4 colon cancer, major surgery and brutal chemo.

We fit in a trip to Lake Tahoe (before chemo) and Maui (after chemo) in that time. We were lucky he was honest. Most aren't.
Start planning NOW.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report
NeedHelpWithMom May 3, 2024
So happy that you were able to go on these trips.
(1)
Report
See 2 more replies
I think everyone should live everyday like there may not be a tomorrow.

Because we never know, what will come tomorrow and the older we get the less tomorrows we have.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

I can’t relate directly to a spouse with a dementia diagnosis, but I do remember my dad beating himself up after mom’s sudden and complete life change from a stroke. There were several destinations she’d always longed to visit, and dad just never prioritized travel. In the blink of an eye, the opportunity was forever missed. My dad carried so much sorrow for this as he spent his days visiting mom in her nursing home. If there is opportunity now, you feel capable and have that longing, please get going. Living with regrets instead of happy memories is tough
Helpful Answer (4)
Report

Amen to what Daughterof1930 said. Travel now, while you still can. Dementia is very unpredictable. Much like life is. We think, "oh, I have plenty of time to travel or do this or that " and then illness or tragedy strikes. And life changes on a dime. Tomorrow is guaranteed to no one.

My DH and I traveled quite a bit from 2009-2019 when covid shut down the world. Then our world was shut down with his heart issues, 2 surgeries, and a liver transplant. We barely came up for air when I was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. So our exotic traveling days are over now, and we're VERY glad we took those trips when we were able cuz now we're not. I'm currently in remission, thank God, so we may be able to travel within the USA at some point, but that trip to Thailand or Tibet we wanted to take is off the table.

Best of luck.
Helpful Answer (3)
Report

I agree with the other posters who are saying to make the most of the time that is available to you now.

Wishing you peace.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

Dementia can advance very quickly. When you think you're in a plateau, all of a sudden they come out of the bedroom with their underpants on their head, and you realize that this is it. Behavior has become so unpredictable that you don't want to disturb routines, which agitates them. You don't want to put yourself in the situation of quickly finding a suitable restroom when they shouldn't go in by themselves. And so on.

Heed the doctor's advice. You might even want to move it up to the next two years just in case.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

I see from your profile that your hubby has early onset Alzheimer's.
I agree with your doctor. In fact, you cannot predict the progression of this disease, but the one certainty is that he DOES HAVE IT.
The time to enjoy travel is NOW.
You can enjoy other things in future, but travel requires a tremendous amount out of us. I myself don't even enjoy it anymore unless it is travel TO my DD and staying there as my home for a month. That I love. But since my mid 70s the sort of European trips that I found such a marvel and such a wonder now seems simply too tough. It would be tough for him and for you.

So I would say I agree, and AnxietyNacy's note to you below to live life as though there is no tomorrow is spot on perfect. Because NOTHING is guaranteed. You think that you have a glimpse into the future and know what will take which of you. As one who thought I knew years ago, after a diagnosis of breast cancer, until that earthquake that sounded like a locomotive coming at me down the tracks--WE DON'T know the future.
Live now.
Helpful Answer (2)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter