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Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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Not so much stubborn, but trying to prove they are still capable of independence. Unfortunately with our mom, it meant seriously goofing up her medications, falling, ending up in ICU and piling up bills she thought she paid. If there is a way to check their bills without being intrusive, that is the best way to start. Unpaid property taxes can result in the home going to a tax sale without you even knowing it. Mom was hiding bills, hadn't paid the water for a year.
It's still much better than this couple from the article above:
Authorities in Alabama say a 78-year-old Decatur woman had been living with the body of her deceased husband for at least a month.
According to WAAY, police were at the home for a welfare check after they were told family members had not heard from the couple in several weeks.
That's when they found 75-year-old Jessie Kirby lying dead in his bedroom. Authorities say he suffered from multiple health problems and believe he died of natural causes.
According to AL.com his wife, Doris Kirby, had Alzheimer's disease and was staying in the living room. The coroner told the website: "I don't think she was comprehending he was not in there with her ... The Alzheimer's was advanced enough to know to eat something but that's about all she knew." blog.al/breaking/2014/03/woman_with_alzheimers_who_live.html
Officers found two dogs who appeared to have died of starvation in the bedroom. Two more malnourished dogs were with Doris in the living room.
I think when dementia is involved, the person is not always fully aware of what their limitations are and are in denial if they know they are struggling with their finances, so they refuse help because of the issue of losing independence.
On ther other hand, I had an uncle and aunt in Pa. He was an odd duck, stayed away from family in Pa. They had no children. He developed Alz and was very advanced when my aunt died in their home. She had been dead for about 3 days when a neighbor found my uncle wandering around outside very confused. They called authorities. The next of kin relative by law was my mother (his sister) who lives here in Ca. There were other siblings still living in Pa at the time, but they had Alz too. My mom had to make arrangements for her brother to be placed in NH through the state and the money from the sale of his house went to the state. My mom did receive all his photo albums which we still have. I am proud of my mother for stepping up the way she did (usually my mom is very selfish and money greedy), she made all the decisions for his care until he passed away about a 1.5 later from complications due to pneumonia. My dad also had Alz during this same time, she traveled to Pa with my dad...in early stages.
My mother currently is in a memory care facility due to....Alz. Family history with those who live into their 80's on mom's side all developed Alz.
I don't know that "stubborn" applies when dementia is involved. In their world they really do not need help. That is their reality. "Demented," yes. "Delusional," yes. "Stubborn," not in the same sense it would apply to a mentally healthy person.
I guess because I was raised in a dysfunctional family and read lots on the subject...the word stubborn brings to my mind a person who has control issues, a person who has to be right, has to have all power or they throw tantrums such as pounding fists on the table, becoming silent but refusing to bend, and refuses to discuss the issue or worse. Funny how we can have different perspectives.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Authorities in Alabama say a 78-year-old Decatur woman had been living with the body of her deceased husband for at least a month.
According to WAAY, police were at the home for a welfare check after they were told family members had not heard from the couple in several weeks.
That's when they found 75-year-old Jessie Kirby lying dead in his bedroom. Authorities say he suffered from multiple health problems and believe he died of natural causes.
According to AL.com his wife, Doris Kirby, had Alzheimer's disease and was staying in the living room. The coroner told the website: "I don't think she was comprehending he was not in there with her ... The Alzheimer's was advanced enough to know to eat something but that's about all she knew."
blog.al/breaking/2014/03/woman_with_alzheimers_who_live.html
Officers found two dogs who appeared to have died of starvation in the bedroom. Two more malnourished dogs were with Doris in the living room.
On ther other hand, I had an uncle and aunt in Pa. He was an odd duck, stayed away from family in Pa. They had no children. He developed Alz and was very advanced when my aunt died in their home. She had been dead for about 3 days when a neighbor found my uncle wandering around outside very confused. They called authorities. The next of kin relative by law was my mother (his sister) who lives here in Ca. There were other siblings still living in Pa at the time, but they had Alz too. My mom had to make arrangements for her brother to be placed in NH through the state and the money from the sale of his house went to the state. My mom did receive all his photo albums which we still have. I am proud of my mother for stepping up the way she did (usually my mom is very selfish and money greedy), she made all the decisions for his care until he passed away about a 1.5 later from complications due to pneumonia. My dad also had Alz during this same time, she traveled to Pa with my dad...in early stages.
My mother currently is in a memory care facility due to....Alz. Family history with those who live into their 80's on mom's side all developed Alz.