Private caregiver wants to be paid even though the patient has been admitted to a hospital for a few days. Is this a common practice?

just because respondents have some bad jobs that is not a reason to be a bad employer.
if you do not have some sort of recorded agreement with caregivers there can be a lot of problems.
I would agree that if you are ok with her quitting don't pay. I think you made some reasonable offers. Ask what she thinks is reasonable and why? those answers may influence you to be more ok with her quitting.
So hard to replace people though.

My mother’s live-in caregiver sat with her when she was in the hospital and made sure she was treated well. The nurses were grateful for her help. Our caregiver was paid as usual at those times.

As a caregiver I disagree especially if we are good! So many are not ! If I call in sick I’m not paid ? If one gets sick I should at least get half my wages as I to have bills & a mortgage

If you want to keep the caregiver pay them.

Good caregivers are hard to find.

Assume she will be looking.

We also give a large Christmas bonus (at the direction of my mother's lawyer.) I've been threatened about the Christmas bonus in the past --have to give it certain day etc.
This person no longer works for me.

No. No work no pay. If my caregivers don't work they don't get paid.

As a caregiver for 20 years when my people are at the hospital or visiting family I have the day off. BUT I earn vacation time to fill in for the lost wages. If I didn't have vacation time I would be screwed. I think that a good caregiver should continue to receive wages, but they need to be doing something to earn them. There is nothing wrong with helping in other ways. I love and respect my people and would do pretty much anything to stay as their caregiver. Good luck.

I suppose the bottom line in all of this is does she value this particular employee?

Has the employee gone above and beyond for her client to the past? Or has she been a person that has done the bare minimum?

I have been at jobs where I was promoted and received raises because I have gone above and beyond.

I had a coworker who was very resentful because they felt that they should have been promoted instead of me because she was there longer.

The owner of the company politely told her that I deserved the promotion more than she did and that I was going to be her boss whether she liked it or not.

This woman was absolutely miserable and showed absolutely no respect for me. It didn’t end well for her. I ended up having to fire her.

She went to my boss and told him that she should not have been fired and he backed me 100 percent. She didn’t stop there! She had her mother and the pastor of her church call me. Of course, I didn’t discuss anything with them and promptly told them that I was busy and hung up the phone.

So, it truly depends on this person’s work ethic and her past work history for this client. If she is an exceptional employee then I would consider paying her. If not, then she could find another job and I would look for a future employee and have a contract ready for them to sign so that this situation wouldn’t be questioned in the future.

She sounds very entitled..as if she is above helping out with other tasks while your person is in the hospital. Not very caring to even refuse to sit with the person at the hospital to be compensated.... You are being very generous and she is being very ungrateful for your efforts. . Maybe see her true colors and give her a small severance while ushering her out the door and find someone who is better suited to what your expectations are and put them in wtiting. . Maybe a suggestion is to contact AARP and find out where to post a job for an older more compassionate caregiver, who wants a job , has a good work ethic, and a way to give back to society. There are a lot of seniors overlooked because of their age by many employers.

If you want her still to be available when the person comes home from hospital, you'd better offer a retainer. If you're not that bothered and you don't yet have a discharge date and she can easily be replaced, then thank her for her past efforts and suggest she moves on. But what does it say in your contract with her?

InvisibleOne: Perhaps you should continue to provide her with a paycheck as she is quite valuable to you.

Tell her if she wants personal/sick/vacation days & get paid for them to sign up with agency. If she does work, she gets paid. No work, no pay! Simple. She thinks she can push you around. No way.

Yes, sounds like she sees you as a 'cash cow.'
And taking you for what she can.
In consideration how to proceed, consider how much you want her to continue to work with you/r the intended person. If she gets 'mad,' she may up and leave.
Is this okay with you? Even if you want her to continue on, she needs to know that you are paying her as you feel / deem is fair and appropriate - that YOU are calling the shots, not her.

It is a very personal question depending on how the payment / work arrangement has been set up. However, everything can be changed as you want it to.

* In reading a few of the other comments, I'd suggest IF you want to continue to pay her, have a tier system. If no client work, pay accordingly (less). This way, she is getting some $ but not 100% as she isn't doing 100% of the work she would usually do.
- Also, if she is an ind contractor, it is really UP TO HER to fill her time with other clients as she can. For a few days or week or longer, she could register at an agency so she will have work. This is her responsibility. And agencies are in desperate need of caregivers. So, she has options.


Be sure to get agreements in writing. Dated and details. Have both you and she sign it.

Are you taking taxes out of her payment(s)?
It is necessary to report this income?
How you pay her could have repercussions or a situation if she reports you, 'her employer' to the government for not paying what she is owed. This could get sticky.

My sense is that she could be paid HOURLY for the work she is doing.
If there is no person to work with - and she doesn't want to do housework, they no $. In other words, no workee, no money.

When I was in a similar situation (as a worker/ind contractor), I asked to be paid if / as I was 'on call.' Being 'on call' means that I need to reserve my time for the possibility of being called to work 'on a moments notice which means I could not (and didn't) take on any other client work. I had to keep myself available.
(Although most of the times, I didn't get paid.)

Gena / Touch Matters

I always paid when we were going to be away from the home. I had the greatest neighbor who did certain things each week to help my parent. She worked here and for another neighbor who needed similar help for elderly parent. She depended on that income, so I didn't think it was fair to not pay her when it wasn't her fault for our absence. Plus without us in the house, she could come in and do a little heavy cleaning here and there, so it worked out. Maybe her actual time in the house was a little less than when parent here, but worth it to us to maintain her pay and her help.

Also, if she couldn't depend on us for the normal wage each week, it would be possible that she would find other employment. To have someone in the home that we knew absolutely we could trust meant a lot.

I have no idea why your person would be angry to 'earn' her pay while your mom in the hospital. It doesn't mean she's anyone's maid, she is just earning her pay. Since her usual job is handling tasks for your mom, have her reorganize her closet, drawers, etc - things that can get out of order. Like put all the winter to the back, summer to the front now. I would just tell her, I understand mom is away right now, but here's the things you can do so you don't lose any pay. Let her take it or leave it. Caregiving for a person isn't just sitting there, it means doing things that person can no longer do for themself...like organize the closet or go to the hospital to 'caregive/observe patient' to earn pay.

Here’s what my so has gone through in his last 8 months as a maintenance man in a facility.

He makes 33 an hour. Not tax free or tax optional.

He has had to deal with sitting with old people until caregivers come.

He has had to negotiate interactions between them, their (usually) senior aides and so forth when some wit leaves the stove on and whoops, now there’s an appliance destroyed.

He has had to handle a senior deciding to take a swan dive off the roof. Blood, skull, brains.

This woman, what is she expected to do? Just do some housekeeping before the lady comes home? Like, the op is saying this is not long term.

I know I was trained as an RN. I know I worked in the best paid city for nurses in the USA. BUT, at the end of my career I had a very large salary, a very strong union that allowed me to stand strong against all comers be they family members or doctors. Along with a very good salary and outrageous overtime I got 5 weeks vacation a year and 12 holiday and personal days. This is all to say nothing of pension plans and insurance for my entire family.

My only point in all this is not to say that a caregiver is the same as an RN. Not in skills, and WOW, certainly not in salary and benefits. BUT they are more and more needed, and less and less happy with the abuse of being expected to accept less than minimum wage, and no days off, no benefits at all, and to be there when wanted and not when not wanted. The fact that a senior goes into hospital for say four days? One might look on it as a welcome vacation, but certainly it is less welcome when one isn't paid and has bills that will show up no matter whether they can work that day of not.

So right or wrong I think this is coming. We are going to have to pay more for help as there are fewer and fewer to do the work and more and more who need the work done. I think if we CAN (and of course this is paramount) we would be really wise, if we have a worker who is "gold" to do all we can afford to do to appreciate and keep him or her.

Just opinion. I fully recognize how horrifically expensive in home care can be over time. Don't know how many do it. And feel awful for both sides in the issue.

I agree that to keep a good caregiver paying her to keep her is worth it.

my issue with the caregiver is she should at least go to the hospital and sit with your Mother. She would actually be doing less as they have assistants at the hospital so she would be a companion and assist with issues when the bell isn't answered in a timely fashion.

having someone available that Mom is familiar with also helps prevent institutional dementia which I witnessed with my Grandfather.

if your Mother is released to a rehab facility Medicare will cover up to 100 days. If this happens I would insist she go to the rehab and do her hour's and earn her salary.

I appreciate you paying a generous wage and bonus. I used to get $9.00 an hour as a private aid. The aids at my Moms facility are underpaid as well. They are wonderful and it ticks me off

I think most of us understand the need for some security, caregivers are across the board underpaid for the value of what they provide caring for loved family members. Since it sounds as if she’s been a longer time valuable dependable caregiver I would demonstrate this by at a minimum paying her a flat fee for the time your relative is in the hospital, request she spend time with him or her to provide companionship and also be an advocate, as we all know patients receive better overall care in the hospital when there’s a friend or relative around so that would be a plus

What about the caregiver receiving unemployment benefits? That's what happens when there's no work at a lot of businesses.

Any worker is replaceable. I am sure that you will be able to find someone else to fill her spot and they will most likely be grateful to have a job.

This arrangement is a partnership. Why should she demand exactly what she wants? A good deal occurs when both parties are satisfied.

Make that vacation pay so that she doesn't expect another vacation or she can be a maid for a few days and improve her patient's living conditions. No one gets paid for nothing unless they're recipients of welfare.

Hi there!
I would think that if she expects to get paid while not doing caregiving because of the hospitalization of patient then she needs to do something. I don’t like this person’s attitude. How long will the patient be in the hospital?
If it’s for a short period of time then pay her but she has to do something for the pay and don’t take any crap from her! Housework, hospital visits, etc.
In the meantime, maybe look for someone else. It is difficult to find good help and if you have a good relationship for the most part, try to work something out. In the meantime, look for someone else just in case.
My family hires IHSS caregivers through our county.
Look into it. The caregivers are all background checked and experienced.
I hope you can work something out with this person but definitely look at your options.

Do you want her available when and if the patient returns home? You might ask her what she considers fair, then decide if you can manage it. Her own choice may have to be to find other employment. She may be concerned that her job is disappearing. Did you consider finding more steady work? Consider it economics not caring or character. Easier on everyone.

My facility starts LVNs at 40 bucks an hour. That’s a very generous rate to be paying someone who I assume is a cna at best to take care of just one person. She’s more than welcome to apply at my facility, which starts them at 20. They get a year end bonus of about 2500. Full time.

My in laws have had aides since 2020. For over 28 months, they’d be regularly in the hospital. They did housework to prepare for their return. They took the cat to boarding. Etcetra and so on.

This so,an will always be trouble. I suggest you get rid of her.

It depends on how much you want to keep her. think of it as insurance that she will be there when he gets home. We kept paying my dad's caregiver while he was in the hospital. and when he finally moved into memory care, we gave her a generous severance pay.
she should be willing to do other work for you. keep the communication open.

If you like her and her work, pay her. Good caregivers are hard to find. ❤️

It depends on what arrangement you set up when you hired her. If this was not covered then it is questionable.

I’d say it really depends on how much you want to keep this one particular caregiver. Good ones are hard to find, and yet I too, don’t care for attitude.

in my seven years of being a house manager, I never paid caregivers who were not caring for my Mr. and Mrs. They too got bonuses and other perks to keep them happy and none of them complained.

I just read how much you’re paying her. My goodness this woman is not very appreciative. But I would also say at the pay rate you’ve gotten her very used to a healthy income and it would be hard to make ends meet for extended rehab or hospital stays. Other people have good ideas like half pay or having her there @ rehab even if she’s doing nothing but keeping her company.

As a former House Manager who conversed with the head of a caregiving company, we both agree - good caregivers have us by the balls. (I apologize for the graphic but it’s accurate).

I am assuming you have a written contract in place that addresses such scenarios. Caregivers deserve to be treated as the professionals they are.

Hmmmmmmm…tough decision. Couldn’t she sit at the hospital and give you time off? We spent 12 hr days with our mom while she did hospital/rehab a few months ago…If the caregiver is fabulous then yup pay her. She could be earning cash elsewhere but waits day to day to get back to work. Otherwise you could find a different caregiver after this episode ends. We paid $4600 AL rent when mom spent 30 days in rehab {extra cost} in the same community.. thats a lot of storage fees when you think about it but discharging and such would be a huge inconvenience. Sadly this is the cost of advanced old age.

If you want to keep her for when the patient returns, you should continue to pay her her regular, full rate.

I pay my caretakers when my father has to be taken away from his residence for any reason (dr appts, hospitalization, etc). I take their job seriously. It is their livelihood. I want them to know that I take it seriously. I don’t want them looking elsewhere for work when he is away. I believe it shows them respect for what they do and that they are not just someone who fills space when I need them. One of my caretakers is able to come to the hospital when my dad is there and I pay mileage as well as “hospital pay“ which is a little more hourly. The way I look at it is I would be paying them anyway, so it’s not really an additional cost other than mileage. They are giving me a huge break if they can come to the hospital and I don’t have to be there all day as well as all night.