My 93 yr old mum was moved to nursing home recently against her will because she was considered high risk at home. She has become very aggressive and fearful. Although she can be confused she can really focus on what's important. She calls me names has packed her bag and demanded a taxi to take her home. She tells the nurses they are holding her against her will. I know all this is true but in the past when she returns home she begins doing crazy things like trying to light an electric fire with firelighters. She tells me I am evil and my heart is broken because I see her struggling. What can I do?
I try not to visit because it disturbs me and mum. I imagine her pining away. She has lost half a stone in one week with trousers nearly falling off her. She tells me she will die if left. In the past I have rescued her but this time I feel I can do no more. I have helped care for her for 20 yrs now and the surprising thing is she has better health than me. My dr tells me to leave her there. He reckons that the only solution is for the home to use medication to quiet her otherwise she will end up with noisy patients who have Alzeimer's which she does not have.
Guardianship is only needed if you can not become a Power of Attorney. If he refuses to sign you as his POA or if he's be found by court of law incompetent.
The VA has great benefits for saving the home and possibly caring for him there you may get benefits from the VA if he qualifies. The deed is an important issue but If you can explain in more detail maybe I can guide you in some way. I know much about the minor or major deed and rules applying for help or resources.