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My mother recently passed away and she didn't have a Will. There are 3 of us kids. I really don't know what to do because she left us with a real mess. My father died 10 years ago and intentionally omitted my brother from his Will because my brother stole 20,000.00 cash from his safe. My sister was Executor of his will. He left the house to my mother(paid off) for her to live and she had other means to live very comfortably. My brother, his 2 kids, and girlfriend lived with my mother. (2013) None of them worked. In 2018 all her money was gone so brother and his girlfriend had her apply for a Reverse Mortgage.( His girlfriend was named the contact person under my mother's so they won't even talk to any of us). Mom received 27,000.00 in 2018 and in 2019 another 27,000.00. My brother was buying collectible toys and comic books on Ebay mind you he didn't work. Nothing was updated or fixed in my mother's house and not one of them cleaned in there. It's utterly terrible. During those years I stayed away and only called my mother on the phone because I knew how "shady" my brother was. Do I list my brother's comic book collection as assets? or just leave it be? I don't have any intention on ever having anything to do with him after all this is done. Anyone out there with similar situation? Just can't believe how messy all of this is especially with the RM on it. It's really devastating.

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Are you named as the administrator of the estate?

The comic books are your brother's property at this time. They are not and never were the property of your Mother unless SHE Collected them, paid for them, and he stole them from her (something you would be unable by now to prove.

There may be nothing left in this estate once the reverse mortgage is handled. I myself would not want to mess with it. Amounts such as 27,000 are not large in terms of today, and clearly she got the reverse mortgage so she could live off of it plus her SS.

There are three children. One of them may be appointed as the administrator of the estate. That one will gather the bills against your mother's estate and the accounts belonging to it, and then with the help of a probate attorney can divide the estate according to the dictates of your state.

Whatever happened in the past is IRRELVANT completely unless your estate administrator finds in your mother's affects some sort of IOUs from the brother.

I myself wouldn't want to act as admin in this mess. I would leave it to a court appointed adminstrator, who, after getting paid might leave little left, but time will tell since no one seems to know or understand what she ever really had.
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While hiring a lawyer is a good idea I have to wonder....
Once the RM is paid and or the house sold what remains minus what your brother "stole" and I use that term for using the RM for his own use are you going to get much once the lawyer is paid?
And I would say there is no way you will get anything from your brother.
Even if he sold all his collectables you will not recoup the 54,000.
If both he and his GF could be charged with Elder Financial Abuse that would be one thing, pretty sure that amount is a Felony. Would it accomplish anything? I doubt seriously they would face any jail time.
I would think once the house is sold he and his GF will be homeless
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Me, I would just let it go. You don't have to do probate. I would make sure if she was getting a pension that those people be notified of her death. I would make sure all her utilities knew she had passed. Not sure if they will turn off the utilities, might just wait and see if bills are paid if not, then they shut them off. Make the tax office aware of Moms death. Brother could lose house for non-payment of taxes. Water will be shut off for non-payment. If you call the Mortgage company about her death, they will immediately call in the loan. Then the house will need to be sold. The heirs getting what is left. If she was getting a monthly check a month, it should be stopped. I would think there is a way for brother to get into Moms account and spend it. Thats fraud.

Brother has already lost Moms SS check that probably paid the bills. He is going to lose the house on way or the other. I would not even go the thru the headache of him stealing from Mom. What you will get for that headache will be...nothing.
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I would consult with a lawyer to see what can be done. Part of the property is yours to inherit as direct heirs, but how much is available will depend on how much equity is left after the RM is satisfied. I don't know much about all of that, maybe someone else here can chime in, but my initial feeling is to at least consult with a good attorney, he or she should give you a sense of whether it is worth pursuing.
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So sad.

My brother had my parents do an RM and talked the folks into 'investing' in his business, which was phony as all get out.
But they did it with belief that he would repay them.

The folks go to sell their home to pay for the addition to YB's home for an apartment. Big shock, there was only about $60K available instead of $250K that they "thought" they had.

Shady relatives are just the worst. We worked it out, all us sibs wanted PB to go to jail (and he could have) but mom & dad forgave the debt and actually left him in the will. That was hard to swallow.

He died after dad did and before mom.

Same situation--there was no reason to go 'legal' on OB, he'd lost the money and parents had willingly given it to him.

Your situation is different--if you feel the need to see this through, go ahead and hire an attorney. Whether anything is left after the attorney takes their fee--you'd have that.

But, I'm warning you---it could take years to settle.
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