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I live at dad's house w/ my youngest son (13) & have had to resort to "sharing custody" of dad w/ my bro, & sis due to the amount of care he requires increasing. It is overwhelming for one of us to do this all the time. He gets into mischief or trouble if left alone too long at the house. So, he goes to my bros (down the street), and my sis' in apt. He stays 3or4 days w/ea. Issues of violations in lease agreements have arisen. I say, "tell the truth". They want to hide him. (He can't be on theirs or rent increases). He is technically not living there as his mail comes here. But, he is a handful & he cannot be left alone too long. But, is it against a person's lease (in general) to stay w/ family member for a few days here & there? What else can we do? He doesn't want to go to assisted living. He wants to be w/ his kids. (He also calls a lot of attention to himself by rummaging through trash & talking to people he doesn't know). He doesnt want to go to the senior center any more. Just sticks to us like glue. How do we keep him happy & NOT get into trouble?

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I don't think that where your mail goes defines where you live. People don't live in P O Boxes or private mail drop businesses. Is he actually staying just a few days here or there....read the lease about how long a visitor can stay. None of that probably matters if he is the weird guy going thru the trash and approaching people who don't want to talk to him. You may not be able to grant him his wish not to go back to daycare. He shouldn't be endangering someone else's living arrangements.
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Thank you vegas. This advice helps more than you know! Thank you, thank you, thank you! perspective is soooo good! blou
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Ask the local police what constitutes an individual's residence. I was surprised to learn that here in Michigan if an individual changes his residence by notification to the Michigan Secretary of State, that notification constitutes his residence of record.

If your father is moving around from one place to another, he's not really residing with anyone on a permanent basis. But as VegasLady recommends, check the leases to see if they address temporary vs. permanent residents, and what the limitations might be.
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