Thank you so very much for this forum. I'm an only child taking care of my elderly father after my mom suddenly passed away last year. I am at the end of my rope with him screaming at me and using me as his punching bag because of his anger and hurt he is feeling. I'm doing the best I can but I just feel like he hates me and resents me because I'm here and she is not so he takes it out on me. I try to help him, cook for him, take him to his doctor appts. and go shopping for him but nothing is ever good enough because I'm not my mom. He still treats me like I'm 12 years old and sometimes I feel that way by the way he puts me down and treats me. It's becoming emotionally abusive for me and I'm so shut off from the world I once knew because I'm so depressed but put on a brave face & smile and just take it all in until I'm completely alone to fall apart. And then this happens all over again the next day. I don't look forward anything anymore because I'm just so emotionally drained trying to take care of my very mean Dad all the while I'm trying to take care of my own household with a not so supportive husband. I'm just feel like I'm trapped with no one to turn to. I would appreciate any suggestions or help that anyone could give me or just to send me in the right direction to a support group. Thank you kindly.
Just do your work. It's not your job to make anyone happy by smiling. Just go and get it all done and remind yourself that just doing all those tasks is really quite a lot. Give yourself a break and don't try to be the bluebird of happiness because it's just more strain.
Our parents can be very mean to us because they feel it is their right to abuse their children. If your father is like mine was he doesn't give a d**n how you feel because his total focus is on himself. You must realize your father is either narcissistic, mentally ill or just plain mean.
We all have our problems, illnesses, death of a loved one, chronic pain, but it does not give us the right to abuse someone who loves us and is trying to do the best for us. Get out. Find other care for his ungrateful man.
There is no law that says you have to take care of him!
Take care of yourself!!