The price of obituaries?

I am sorry you have to go through this. Some forums for
an obituary are unreasonable in the price. I notice that my
clients use the services of the funeral home they use; or
publish in a neighborhood paper that is free or reasonable
An obituary is important and helpful to outsiders. I search titles as part of my practice and often use Obits as the source for locating heirs or verifying the passing of an individual. It is a good way of making a record that your family member was a part of the community; but I
would find an alternate to the large regional newspaper.

When my motherinlaw died this year, the funeral home took the information and posted an obit on their website for free. We inquired about sending an obit to MIL’s hometown paper but it would have cost $750. More for a longer write-up. Nothing for free (in the newspaper). We just went with the funeral home obit and let everybody know.

I'm sorry for your loss.
When my mom died I wanted a newspaper obit w photo. She would have liked to be remembered in the way her generation did it.
The funeral home took care of it all, included in their package. I emailed my final "draft" to the director w a photo. It was in the paper 1 Sunday and also the funeral home put it online. Also online thru the newspaper's website.
You just have to ask yourself if it's important to you or family as a remembrance.

I'm not an expert, but I've done enough family history to know the value of an obituary. It links an individual with the past (parents) and future (children) and usually more generations. It gives information on burial and sometimes personality. I believe obituaries are worth the money spent and feel if one is not published, it leaves no historical proof a person existed.

I am sorry for your loss. You made the right choice... classified advertising are (were) the most profitable section of a newspaper and to rip off grieving family members, even more, should be criminal!

Here in Southern California obits run from $800.00 to a $1000.00, which is part of the 'way tooexpensive' part of burying someone. This is off the subject of obits, but here we have private, county and city cemeteries. As you can imagine, the prices of certain services are different.
Where my parents are buried is private and the cost of setting a headstone is $500.00 not including a marker. The marker itself runs just as much, if not more.
At a Riverside CA owned cemetery, the cost of setting a headstone is no more than $250.00 and you can buy the marker online or through the cemetery. If you had to purchase a plot, service and flowers, the cost at a private facility is as much as $20K for a plot, $7,500.00 for preparation of viewing and service and $3K for site prep for a total of $30,500.00.
When people are mourning a loved one, it is very easy for a cemetery to use that state of emotion to cash in. You can purchase coffins at Walmart and other online resources.
The smart thing, if you can afford it, is to by funeral insurance early in life and it could end up saving you thousands of dollars. Death is expensive, but it doesn't have to kill you! Good luck skip the obit.

A well–written obit posted via social media actually seems more effective to me, as it can include photos, allows feedback, and for practical purposes has a much longer lifespan and reach than a newspaper obituary. I'm sorry for your loss.

When my grandpa died the family had some laminated bookmarks made with his (colour) picture, and other obituary style info on them, and mailed them out to everyone in his (small rural) town. It was super affordable and they're something that people who knew him would keep, not just throw out like a newspaper article. You could go for something like that.

First and foremost, I am so sorry for the loss of your wife.

I wholeheartedly agree that the price is exorbitant, but when there is only one newspaper in town, there isn’t much choice. Our local paper prints what is called a “death notice “ for free. Includes name, date of death, and funeral home contact.
The information is provided by the funeral home; you really have no control over the contents. The newspaper sets the standard for the info for the funeral home to supply.

An obituary usually contains name, date and city of death. Place and date of birth, parents names. Survived by names: spouse, children and grandchildren, sisters/brothers etc. Then the family decides whatever best suits the departed: education, career highlights, favorite hobbies, religious affiliations, clubs, etc

Then the burial information, which includes place, date, and time for visitation, memorial service, and burial; funeral home contact info, special requests (donation in lieu of flowers, etc). Some include officiant and pallbearers.

Most newspapers charge by the length, so anything other than very basic information can get very expensive.

The biggest problem with social media is that many elderly are not members. And as you said, they are used to checking the obituaries daily.

My only solution is a VERY brief obit that lists the deceased’s name, and refers readers to a social media site (name included) for more information. Once the elderly reader has seen the basic information, they can usually find a tech savvy relative to help them access the social media site.

4 figures for an obit sounds a little steep. Were you going to write one that basically tells the life story (like is commonly done) or something simple. You might ask how much something very basic would cost - name, family members, burial date. Newspapers have gone crazy. About 2 times a year, my mom's subscription cost goes up. Six times a year they charge $7 more per month to give you 'special' inserts...as in the black friday ads, rodeo time, all about town eating out, etc. None of which she reads or needs, but you can't opt out of them. They used to put her paper in a basket on front porch because she can't get out of the house. Now they no longer provide services like that for disabled people. So at 97, they suggested she learn to use a computer -- and pay the same price for online reading. Basically she goes through it each day - looks for people she knows in the obits - and then does the puzzles. Sad that a customer since 1959 can't get a break.

Imho, a media business is out to make a profit, though a lot of its financials/profits are garned through advertisements. You can make the obituary as short as you wish or skip it totally. I am so very sorry for your loss and send condolences.

Newspapers are about as relevant to the world today as a stone tablet and a chisel. They've lost most of their readers and are just trying to fleece the few holdouts.

Dear HisPathway77
when my parents passed they did the orbit as long as it was under so many words. They may not now.

Don't funeral homes post obits?

I did not know how much it was and did not know what exactly we were able to afford at the time so no we opted to not have the obituary. Had plenty of good memories already, and I can always write up a personal message for the family to keep. Reason why we said no to the obituary: dad recently moved with me due to health and needed assistance, he really only knew people where he was from. His state of mind was not to where he could make new friends where he stayed before his death. He went rather quickly and we did not have a good idea what to put in the obituary at the time between my mom and I (still grieving a lot at that time). I do not regret not getting one. I was a little afraid to post anything in any paper due to the fear of scammers which was another problem that my parents were facing prior to the move. Also trying to get bills cancelled that were unnecessary was very difficult prior to his death and even after some bills took over a year to be stopped. That's what autopay does for you and your loved ones. But eventually things got straightened out mostly. I still have some questions on things mom keeps up but I will deal with it when the time comes.
As said it is a purely personal decision. I went online looking for a historical obituary of my sister. She died very young, I was disappointed that it was nearly impossible to find. I think mom may have a clipping in her things somewhere. So its like most things will you keep up with it, will it even matter much to future generations? --That kind of thing.

But no price mentioned?

Shame on man always looking to make a buck and during a stressful time on the family! Social media is a great remedy to get back at their greed.

Newspapers are dying and they get their money through announcements at a ridiculous amount. I agree, forget the obit.

Sorry about your loss. It’s so wrong that the grieving have to deal with guilt because of money.
I really do not get your liberal comment. Makes no sense to me and I’m a liberal. I do not plan on having an obituary for my husband and of 45 years nor do I want one for myself. It’s an obscene cost, just as caskets and funeral director’s prices.

As others have already mentioned there are many ways to post an obituary online without paying for one.

Please do not feel guilty for refusing to pay to have the obituary in a print newspaper with an online presence. I agree your wife would likely not approve of the cost.

Use the money to take your family out to dinner a few times, or for something else that is for you.

If you do post an obituary on line, and it has details of the time of the Service... please ensure that a neighbor will sit in the house as a house sitter so that no one can break in, while no one is home.

Burglars often read obituaries and note the time of the service.

Lastly, I have a friend that worked for a large Newspaper in Philadelphia, She is older and told me that in the 80s and 90s the newspaper used to post obituaries for free.

In fact, she said they would contact the funeral homes for the information. It was a way to attract readers to the paper.

But that was a time when print newspapers were profitable because they did not have competition from the internet.

Now most newspapers are failing financially and they charge for obituaries because they need revenue.

I think it is shortsighted to charge because obituaries are still a way to attract readers.

A few small weekly local newspapers will still print an obituary for free.

In addition: Here are a couple of links to a sites that lets you post an obituary with pictures for free.

https://everloved.com/articles/obituaries-and-funeral-announcements/how-publish-obituary-free/

https://obituarieshelp.org/free_obituaries_hub.html

We published my dad's in two small local papers which were free. The larger paper - wanted hundreds of dollars for a very minimal obituary. We do not regret it and it has been 7 years. The funeral home has a website where people who knew my dad could find it and even today it is still accessible.

Smaller local newspapers will print obituaries for free or a small cost. Funeral homes often have their own web pages and will post for free. Later you could post it and several photos at https://www.findagrave.com/ This is a free website with thousands of obituaries and grave sites. You may find other friends and family posted there. Local Genealogy societies could also direct you to where you might be able to publish the obituary. Good luck. So sorry for your loss.

The question of paying for obituaries is a personal one and there is no right or wrong answer. I starting writing my parents obituaries one year prior to their death because I wanted the last written word about them to reflect their legacy to our family, friends, and community. Since they both had dimentia at the same time it was cathartic to me to write their obituaries during this time when I was experiencing “dimentia grief”. When they died, the obits were written and ready to go. When I found out the cost (700.00 each) I was shocked and in disbelief. I did go forward and pay the price as opposed to using social media. For me , posting on my Facebook page would have been too emotional for me and seemed less private. The funeral home did post their obits and those who did not get the local paper saw the obits that were posted thru the funeral home. I was amazed at how many people read the obits in the paper and online and how many people responded in a positive way to this written account of their lives.

You, your kids, your grandchildren, and/or church or other groups to which your wife belonged and post a lovely obituary on Facebook or other social media sites - including as many pictures as you like - at no cost.
Just be careful about sharing too much detail about the service, when you won’t be home. You can ask friends/followers to contact a point person or send service details to interested parties via private messages.
I am so sorry for your loss.
God bless.

My condoleances for your loss.

I plan not to publish anything about my mom's passing when it will happen. She is in her mid 90 and most of her friends and colleagues have already had their obituaries published...
Those who care about her, keep in touch with her , or me, will be easily informed phone, email. For those who have disappeared from her life, my opinion is that if they are not interested in how she is doing when she is still alive must not care much about that last event in her life.
As for support for those who are left, same logic, my close friends and family members will be easily reached by the same means we stay in touch already. No need for papers nor social media.
I admit it is a hard tradition to leg go of. It was used for a long time as an hommage to the person. That can be done in the eulogy with the close circle who cares. I recently lost someone overseas, and the family and close friends had a private link to access life the garden and the funeral home ceremony.

I don't know what "liberal politics" could have to do with it, but I agree with many responders that it's not worth it to have an obituary appear in the printed 'paper of record' for the area (ie. the main newspaper for the nearest city).
People receive their news online and the funeral home will publish an obituary online that will be far more comprehensive than you would be willing to pay to have published in a printed newspaper. You can spread the link via social media and email and reach virtually everyone who wants to see it.
If there's a very local newspaper that is still widely read and your wife was active in the community, have it published there. They are usually reasonably priced, sometimes free.

I agree with all responses on the forum. After my dad passed away, my sister and I were in the public library and happened to notice there were notebooks full of death certificates for people to use for genealogies. We were shocked to see social security numbers there for anyone and everyone to get their hands on. We removed ALL family members from the notebooks. I only mentioned this because of everyone's concern for scammers.

It was $500 for my sons in 2018 for 2day weekend.

Some people put a brief obit in the paper directing people to the funeral home website where they can publish a longer one free of charge and optionally include pictures. I personally would not put an obit on social media.

My husband just died a few months ago at 84. I published an extensive obituary on the funeral home web site, including photos and sent that link to everyone via social media, email, text, etc. We did not live near any of his family or friends so that was a way to share his passing and it was included in the funeral home package. Because I've also worked on family ancestry I know that a lot of historical information we have about people is from old obituaries so I did pay for publication of the obituary in one newspaper. Because of it's historical value I was also careful to include birth, graduation and marriage dates as well as military service, etc.