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No one from pain management will call us back! It’s been well over a month since last contact, though we’ve left dozens of messages, because they never answer. It’s so damn frustrating, my dad just wants to be pain free, at 80 yrs old with a lot wrong terminally, yet not one damn doc returns any calls! Going on week number 6



🤦‍♀️😑🙁

It's my experience that you will get a response much quicker if you use the patient portal to contact any of your dads medical providers, as they are required to respond within 48 hours.
I'm guessing that you haven't tried that huh?
And if your dad is in that much pain perhaps it best that you just take him to the ER, and tell them you're not taking him home until he gets the help he needs.
We often have to take the ball in our own hands and do whatever we have to for our loved ones and not be so dependent on how things used to be where doctors actually called their patients back. That just isn't realistic anymore.
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Debsturr Nov 26, 2024
Oh yes, I do use the portal for his doctors that are on it. However, his neurologist won’t even use email, they are still 💯 paper 🤣🤦‍♀️ it’s just awful! As for pain management we’ve went as far as reaching out to corporate. Of course we do provide relief by going to urgent care/er and we’ve scheduled with a new doc for pain management but their first available is April. I know I should be grateful it’s not worse, but sometimes a girl has to vent 🥰
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Get dad's PCP to write an order for a hospice evaluation or at least a palliative care consult. He'll get pain meds much quicker and easier that way. With the conditions you describe, he should have no problem. I'm sorry the medical field lacks professionalism these days, it's definitely frustrating,

Best of luck.
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Deb,
I see your profile and remember you've written us in past
I just don't have time to read former posts to see just what sort of pain Dad is in.

I'm 82, a retired RN. My opinion at this point is that to put me completely out of pain would mean hospice and being medicated to comatose state below the level of dreaming. Pain has become a part of my life.

So it's important to know just WHAT pain dad has and WHY he has it?
Also what medications does he take; what helps and what doesn't?
Also, does Dad have a pain consultant/pain clinic?
There is a good deal of difference in the pain of chronic joint and muscle and bones and the pain of cancer not adequately medicated.

Moreover, if this is chronic pain that requires drugs so potent that they take dad "down" as in falls and such, then the drugs themselves are life threatening.
That gets weighed against the value of a life lived in chronic torment, which is likely worse than death itself.

Solution:
Ultimately, you are down to the fact that you cannot reach a doctor for now SIX DAYS.
If this is severe pain (cancer, spinal stenosis, etc) then it is off to the ER by ambulance where Dad will be fully assessed.
What you will tell ER is this:
"For six days I have tried multiple times to get JUST AN ANSWER and no one has.
SIX DAYS OF PAIN is tantamount to torture. If he cannot be referred to help then this ER is going to see a whole lot of us".
The important thing about going to ER by ambulance is that it first of all vouches for the pain level and it secondly gets dad into a cubicle rather than sitting in the lobby waiting in pain.

Good luck. Do update us. You might try the call of desperation today as in:
"My next call if I don't hear from you in an hour will be to EMS to transport Dad to ER by ambulance. This pain can no longer to tolerated.:

I am so sorry. As an RN the one thing I simply could not handle was an inability to relieve pain. You have my deep sympathy.
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AlvaDeer Nov 26, 2024
I read down a bit further, and yes, palliative and hospice is now likely the best way to relief.
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"a lot wrong terminally" if this means Dad is dying then you need to get Hospice on board. Then, no more Drs.
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Contact a Hospice of your choice.
They will evaluate and if he qualifies for Hospice it will be easy to get in touch with your care Team.
Primary goal of Hospice is that they will relieve pain and keep the patient comfortable.
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