Hi all, have a question about rehab. My FIL will be discharged from the hospital and sent to rehab soon, for physical therapy. He is not on Medicare, he is on Medi-cal. It appears he is not going to cooperate with physical therapy. He’s basically been laying in bed for a month and before that he was having mobility issues. He keeps refusing speech and occupational therapy at the hospital and it seems like he’s given up. He’s only 64. The speech therapy is because his cancer has caused a very rare condition that makes it difficult to swallow and talk. I can’t recall the name of the condition but it starts with an M. Anyway so when he goes to rehab, what happens when he refuses to participate? Do they basically show him the door? I assume they send him home and it is what is. He’s also supposed to start chemotherapy because of the rare condition. I don’t think anyone of his kids is managing his care and my husband is in no condition to do it. My BIL has POA but isn’t doing anything but continuing on with his life (not that I blame him to be honest). I’m just curious what’s next if he won’t cooperate when he gets to rehab. I know how it works when you are Medicare patient but like I said, he’s not on Medicare yet. Thank you.
Now on the other hand, my late mother, a Medicare patient in an NH, got zero chances and was told "you're too well to stay here." THEY WERE WRONG-DEAD WRONG SINCE SHE SUFFERED A STROKE 48 HOURS AFTER THAT STATEMENT AND DIED. His doctor should be told the details before it comes to the time when he's asked to vacate.
I have a friend who had a lumpectomy before the holidays. A scan showed that there was no Cancer in her body. She is 77. She researched the side effects of radiation and the chemo pill u take for 5 yrs. She talked to the radiologist and the oncologist and chose not to go with either treatment. She just went to the surgeon, a woman, for a follow. She berated my friend for not doing the treatments saying that she would have taken the breast if she had known she wasn't proceeding with treatment. What! My friend was given choices and felt the side effects were not worth it.
I am so tired of hearing about that "one little cell". My sister went thru 8 months of agressive chemo even after her scan showed no cancer. She couldn't work. She went back to work in July. Started having pain in Sept. Died in October. She lived a year and a half after diagnosis. Would she have lived just as long without the treatments? Its all about the quality of life. How can ur natural ammune system fight when the white blood cells are distroyed too.
They need to see the pt is doing therapy and making progress to get paid. They also need that time slot for a pt that will do therapy. They waste time trying to do therapy on someone who resfuses.
I agree that he needs psych consult. He is not doing well. Does family visit him? Does he have any support? That could be the key to wanting to survive or just give up.
It’s a complicated situation because he has only lived in this state for about 6 months. Prior to that, he saw his children maybe every 2-3 years. He and my MIL were divorced, he was not around much when the kids were growing up so there isn’t exactly a strong bond Between them. If you were to ask my husband, he would say his dad was never around. My BIL is the closest to him. My SIL has been making more of an effort to have a relationship with him now that her mom has passed on. She is the youngest and never really considered him her dad. She had a lot of anger toward him. My husband is neutral. All 3 have supported him and visited him in the hospital, not every day because it’s an hour away from BIL and SIL. He is definitely not receiving the same support my MIL had.
My concern is that he obviously cannot take care of himself and if he’s not going to participate in PT and OT, he’s not going to miraculously get his strength back. My BIL and SIL work during the day and I think They are thinking they can either have him come to our house since I am SAHM or he can go back to my BILs house and have caregivers but.....who do they think is going to pay for the caregivers? They don’t work for free! His income is over the $1242 month limit for IHSS.
He's got Multiple Myeloma, stage 0? It's a very manageable disease; does he know that? Has the oncologist who is treating him explained what is going on in a way that he can understand?
Has anyone suggested a psychiatric consult? Sounds like he's quite depressed.
since the cancer is “just there” or “festering” the doctors say, he was told it didn’t need to be treated. He moved out here in July 2018 and hadn’t seen an oncologist or anyone else about his cancer but he has had medical treatment for bladder and prostate issues. He’s starting chemo, I believe it be given as a shot, only because of the rare condition the cancer caused.
No no one has suggested anything. My husband is only able to go see him once or twice a week. His siblings both work and have young children too and live around an hour away from the hospital. They call him & check in during the week. I think my BIL visits on the weekend, not sure about my SIL.
I don’t think any of them realize that someone needs to step up here and get involved.
My husband was told he would be in a wheelchair by age 50, broke his back twice doing construction work and 15 specialist said that surgery had a greater chance of doing more damage than good, so basically inoperable.
Anyway, I started making him whole food smoothies and bone broth. Changed his life. He is active and healthy, I give The Lord the glory because He did touch his back on a trip to Israel but i believe that his good health today comes from getting the nutrients that he needs to be healthy.
Just for your information.
Also, ask your FIL to sign a HIPPA release for your husband. There is no earthly reason that his son shouldn't be able to get information. Does not effect POAs at all. Our attorney drafted one that doesn't expire, their forms(hospital, doctors) are only valid for 1 year. One of those things they don't tell people.
Having said that, it is sometimes considered therapy if the patient will just sit in a chair. If that’s all they can do.
Also, Medi-Cal May provide for custodial care in his circumstance. I don’t know.
I was told it is fraud for the rehab to bill for therapy they aren’t able to provide.
If your FIL is not incompetent, then the POA can’t force him into any situation FIL doesn’t agree with. Like he can’t force him to take the chemo.
FILs situation sounds very difficult. I’m sorry he is going through this and doesn’t appear to have hope.
WorriedinCa I know you are a frequent poster. So you know about “Being Mortal, Medicine and what matters in the end” by Atul Gawande. If you haven’t read it, please do. Even if you only go online and look at the five questions it might be helpful for your FIL and your husband.
The first one is along the lines of Do you know where you are and what your condition is?
It also helps navigate cancer treatments with doctors. Doctors are often not very comfortable letting a patient know how successful a treatment is etc.
Keep us up to date on how he is doing.
Hugs
I would be getting the answer to that 1st. May be the rehab doesn't even happen.
Can you call medi-cal and find out how they determine if care is provided/paid for?
Good luck, so sad at 64. Many good years ahead with hard work.