What is the best combo of diapers and pads for men’s incontinence?

We use Depend maximum absorbency with a product called Guards (also from Depend). The Guards are like a very thick sanitary napkin with an adhesive backing). I just sick the Guard inside the pull up. On the days my DH takes his diuretic, we have to use both, as his urge to urinate is instantaneous and he literally has no control. I hope this info is helpful

How often are the depends being changed? Every couple of hours?

Is he being toileted every 2 to 3 hours?

Doing both of these should cut down on the messes getting through the depends and pads.

Is he able to get up, stand up or walk? If yes to any of those questions, then I would recommend getting him up on a regular schedule(every 2 hours) to use the toilet, bedside commode, or urinal. If he's not able to do the above, then perhaps whoever is caring for him can at least hold the urinal for him, so he can go more often in that instead of his diapers. Continually getting soaked in one's own pee, can be very damaging to their skin, and that in itself creates a whole other issue. My husband after having to wear Depends and a men's pad inside that, and still wanting to get up every hour(and I mean every hour) to go to the bathroom to pee, ended up having to get a supra pubic catheter put in. That was really a Godsend, as it allowed us both to be able to get a good night's sleep, and I didn't have to worry about him getting up all the time(as he was a fall risk). Best wishes in getting this figured out.

I'm glad he won't wear plastic pants. I didn't even know that the reputable manufacturers made any!

Is "he" - who he? - able to stand at all? To use a commode, a urine bottle, anything?

The right combination of continence care products depends on many different factors. Go to a big supplier's website (just Google "continence care supplies") and you should, if they're worth their salt, find a wealth of advice on choosing the best ones for your individual gentleman.