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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
Is the anger a recent occurrence? If every thing checks out medically you can ask the doctor about antianxiety medications that might help. Is there a particular reason he gets angry? Anger is common with some forms of dementia. But anger can also be due to not understanding what is happening. (Frustration can lead to anger) Is the anger happening at a particular time or activity? Are the caregivers explaining what they are doing? Most caregivers that deal with dementia have been trained and should understand this aspect of the disease. On the other hand if the anger leads to violence that is different and that needs to be watched. Try to observe when the anger occurs and see if you can figure out the why of it. They should be talking to your husband in a calm soothing manner and explaining what they are doing or what he needs to do while they are helping him. And if they can lower the pitch of the voice it might also be easier for him to understand. Higher pitch is the first to be lost when the hearing starts to go.
I am assuming that the "meanness" is just him, not some new thing that could indicate progression of disease, need for assessment or checking to UTI. That said, acknowledgement can go a whole long way. Box of candy, gift card to store, box of donuts can go a long way with a card acknowledging you understand how difficult he is to deal with and you are amazed at their love and patience, that you don't know what you would do without them. This is something they can CARRY with them when they are job hunting in future, something that shows they are special and you recognize that. I would rather have had that than another hours of pay by a long shot when I was a nurse.
Is your father at home or in a care facility? If he is still at home the tried and true way to keep those good caregivers coming, is to make it worth their while. A cash bonus every week. The gratitude and appreciation of kind people like you doesn't go unnoticed by us. Adding a box of chocolates or a gift card along with it is a nice gesture. It really isn't incentive enough to keep a good, hard-working caregiver who's keeping a handle on things coming with a client like your father. Trust me when I say green is everyone's favorite color. Sometimes a homecare isn't an option anymore and the client needs facility placement. If he's in a care facility, they don't allow families to take care of the help on the side in cash. You can make a discreet arrangement to slip his regulars some cash in other ways though. Like "hiring" them to do some work after-hours away from the facility. Which is code for meet them for coffee with a few hundred dollars in an envelope from time to time. Such gratitude and appreciation like this will never be forgotten by any caregiver. You may also want to have a meeting with the in-house doctor if your father's behavior is getting worse. He may need to be in a different level of care too.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
If every thing checks out medically you can ask the doctor about antianxiety medications that might help.
Is there a particular reason he gets angry?
Anger is common with some forms of dementia.
But anger can also be due to not understanding what is happening. (Frustration can lead to anger)
Is the anger happening at a particular time or activity?
Are the caregivers explaining what they are doing?
Most caregivers that deal with dementia have been trained and should understand this aspect of the disease.
On the other hand if the anger leads to violence that is different and that needs to be watched.
Try to observe when the anger occurs and see if you can figure out the why of it.
They should be talking to your husband in a calm soothing manner and explaining what they are doing or what he needs to do while they are helping him. And if they can lower the pitch of the voice it might also be easier for him to understand. Higher pitch is the first to be lost when the hearing starts to go.
That said, acknowledgement can go a whole long way. Box of candy, gift card to store, box of donuts can go a long way with a card acknowledging you understand how difficult he is to deal with and you are amazed at their love and patience, that you don't know what you would do without them. This is something they can CARRY with them when they are job hunting in future, something that shows they are special and you recognize that. I would rather have had that than another hours of pay by a long shot when I was a nurse.
If he is still at home the tried and true way to keep those good caregivers coming, is to make it worth their while. A cash bonus every week. The gratitude and appreciation of kind people like you doesn't go unnoticed by us. Adding a box of chocolates or a gift card along with it is a nice gesture. It really isn't incentive enough to keep a good, hard-working caregiver who's keeping a handle on things coming with a client like your father. Trust me when I say green is everyone's favorite color. Sometimes a homecare isn't an option anymore and the client needs facility placement.
If he's in a care facility, they don't allow families to take care of the help on the side in cash. You can make a discreet arrangement to slip his regulars some cash in other ways though. Like "hiring" them to do some work after-hours away from the facility. Which is code for meet them for coffee with a few hundred dollars in an envelope from time to time. Such gratitude and appreciation like this will never be forgotten by any caregiver.
You may also want to have a meeting with the in-house doctor if your father's behavior is getting worse. He may need to be in a different level of care too.