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My mother has dementia and lives in a memory care facility. Just found her husband has sneakily listed thier house (she is on deed) for sale and is planning on taking the massive proceeds and leaving town. I’d like to protect her. What type of lawyer do I need to make sure I can have just a bit of that money placed in a trust so I can use it to ensure she can continue with her excellent care?

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Her husband is her next of kin. It is also his house. I doubt any attorney would take up this "case" right now without a retainer that you would have to pay because her husband has not done anything wrong (yet).

Is her husband paying the memory care? If not, who is paying?

Have you called the realtor who has the listing and asked whether or not s/he is aware that your mother exists?
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As your profile shows that you are living in California, I’m assuming that your mother also lives in California. California is a community property state which means that any property acquired during the time of the marriage must be divided equally between the parties. Your mother’s husband, therefore, cannot sell the house and pocket all the money. If your mother’s husband sells their house, he will have to give her 50% of the profit. Please refer to California Family Code Section 2550.

You need to seek the advice of an elder law attorney who will advise you on what you should do about this problem.

Good luck.
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Tasha903: Retain an elder law attorney posthaste to ensure that your mother gets half of the proceeds.
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Elder Law Attorney
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I'm sorry to be the one to have to tell you but your mother's husband is her next of kin and her POA. I'm also sorry to tell you that the memory care will take her half of the house when it is sold.
She will not get better care if she's paying in cash or not.

Her husband is not neglecting her if he's had her placed in memory care. It is the responsibility of the facility he put her in to make sure that her care needs are met.

Unless her husband takes the money and leaves the country, they will catch up to him.

Do you really want to pay for lawyers to go after him and demand your mother's half of the money from the house only to hand it over on a silver platter to the memory care she's in?

All he will have to do is say he changed his mind and decided that as the spouse he will remain in the home.
He's the husband and they're not going though a divorce proceeding. There is no splitting up the house and bank accounts.
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CarolPeaches Nov 17, 2023
As long as the memory care receives it's monthly payment, they cannot take her entire 50% of the sale. Once she runs out of money, then she can apply for Medicaid and enter a nursing home or request an Assisted Living Waiver from the state for an assisted living facility that takes memory care patients. On what basis were you giving your advice that the memory care will take her entire 50% right up front? https://www.medicaidplanningassistance.org/medi-cal-assisted-living-waiver/
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Run, don’t walk, this needs attention ASAP. Get involved before its too late. Lawyer up now, you mom needs you more than ever!
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Trust & estate litigation attorney…..they should know what to do
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You need a layer and you can go file for guardianship Immediately . Some states you can file for elder abuse. Most lawyers dont want to deal with this situation and dont Know how. So go to Court see the lawyer of the day and there should be a clinic or someone to help you get Guardian ship rolling . Seek Out elder attorneys Most only deal with trusts and will and suing Nursing Home . So Much elder abuse it occurring and No One to protect these people with dementia - It is Like fighting a custody battle . These people with dementia can not fend for themselves so go to Court and get the guardianship Ball rolling and if someone gets a Court appointed Guardian ad Litum ( That lawyer will protect her interests ) Good luck and get Moving . Make phone calls there are elder attorneys but Most dont deal in this area . Get yourself down to the court House today Hopefully you dont Live 3000 Miles away .
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Thorny issue. Contact local lawyer about whether he needs to split proceeds with her evenly. If not, may have to sue him for "neglecting" her.
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See a lawyer. Not after the fact.
Make sure the escrow company is directed to split the proceeds of the sale, directing them that there is a dispute and the POA is null and void.

From what I understood, way back when, the escrow company cannot release the funds if there is a dispute.

The proceeds end up in a trust managed by the attorneys of each party.

I could be wrong. It could be different in your Mom's case.

You will need a lawyer to protect Mom's interest, now.
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If she is on the deed, if he uses a lawyer for closing, a separate check needs to be made out to her for her half. I would contact the Realtor and make sure that this is done. Does he have POA, then that money has to be put in an acct for her needs. Half of everything they have is hers. Seeing an Elder Lawyer is wise.

When she entered MC, their assets should have been split.
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cwillie Nov 9, 2023
The problem as I understand it would be that as her POA he will have access to any accounts in her name so splitting up the money is essentially meaningless.
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How do you know he plans to take all of the proceeds and leave town? If he knows that you know, how does he think he can pull this off? If this is heresay, I'm not sure you can build a case on a crime that hasn't yet happened.

Is it possible he will take his portion, leave town and maybe give up being PoA?

If you have proof of his existing PoA power abuse, take it to an attorney and be prepared for a fight over guardianship.
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If the POA has a document that allows him to sell, then he can. Half the proceeds from the home will be the Mother's. It is up to an attorney to handle this. If you suspect that the assets are not being managed for the mother see an Elder Law Attorney for options.
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