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Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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Yes, time for another option for MIL. You cannot continue to do what you are doing and you never should have. FIL could have very well taken care of his wife and should have with her daughter helping out or him paying someone. And charging you rent when u were there to help! That really take the cake.
Looks like this is ur SILs personality, letting others do the work. I really don't know why ur so surprised. You have to flat out say to ur husband, I cannot do this anymore. I would think the dialysis alone takes a lot out of you.
Sorry you've. been bullied into doing so much caregiving. I would take a hard look at your situation. You have to put you and your health first. IF you have anything else that you'd like to freely offer to do for your MIL, go for it. But that's all you do. I would consider telling your hubby that you're bowing out and he and his sibling(s) will have to figure out what to do next.
In 1993 we got married and moved to Stockton, CA. Spent $20,000 to move only to be called back because mom got sick with cancer and was told that sister and dad couldn't help her. I was put into the position of caregiver, maid, cook and landscaper with my husband. Husband worked while I worked part-time and cared for her and did other things for the house, too. Father in-law watched tv, sister in-law was working but on her days off ran off to play and not help. Mother in-law didn’t care because she had me. We had to pay rent too ($2,000). Husband decided to move back to Stockton again and thought this would be better for us both. Yes, I was a happy camper. In 2001, I got sick, and husband thought maybe his parents would help him care for me. We moved back and once again I became maid, cook, landscaper again and they wanted to charge us rent, again. Husband put his foot down and said no way, you guys do your own cleaning, yard work and cooking then. I will pay but, my wife isn't doing it all this time. Now that parents were diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and dementia, we are caregivers, too. Sister in-law just takes them to the doctor, and I am the caregiver and not getting paid at all to do it. Dad died in January and Mom is still refusing to let any services help her or have anyone come in to help. What to do?
************************* Your sister in law cannot 'leave the caregiving up to you'..........you have to AGREE to do the caregiving. If you don't, place your loved one in managed care or hire caregivers to come into the home to help with the duties. With dementia at play, mom does not have to 'agree' to any of this as she is no longer in charge of making the rules, you are. You can place her in Memory Care if need be, and if your health is compromised to the point where you can no longer be a good caregiver. We humans can only do what we are capable of doing and when we can do no more, that is when we raise the white flag of surrender, agreeing to let paid help do the rest.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Looks like this is ur SILs personality, letting others do the work. I really don't know why ur so surprised. You have to flat out say to ur husband, I cannot do this anymore. I would think the dialysis alone takes a lot out of you.
Here is your post from June 25th:
In 1993 we got married and moved to Stockton, CA. Spent $20,000 to move only to be called back because mom got sick with cancer and was told that sister and dad couldn't help her. I was put into the position of caregiver, maid, cook and landscaper with my husband. Husband worked while I worked part-time and cared for her and did other things for the house, too. Father in-law watched tv, sister in-law was working but on her days off ran off to play and not help. Mother in-law didn’t care because she had me. We had to pay rent too ($2,000). Husband decided to move back to Stockton again and thought this would be better for us both. Yes, I was a happy camper. In 2001, I got sick, and husband thought maybe his parents would help him care for me. We moved back and once again I became maid, cook, landscaper again and they wanted to charge us rent, again. Husband put his foot down and said no way, you guys do your own cleaning, yard work and cooking then. I will pay but, my wife isn't doing it all this time. Now that parents were diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and dementia, we are caregivers, too. Sister in-law just takes them to the doctor, and I am the caregiver and not getting paid at all to do it. Dad died in January and Mom is still refusing to let any services help her or have anyone come in to help. What to do?
*************************
Your sister in law cannot 'leave the caregiving up to you'..........you have to AGREE to do the caregiving. If you don't, place your loved one in managed care or hire caregivers to come into the home to help with the duties. With dementia at play, mom does not have to 'agree' to any of this as she is no longer in charge of making the rules, you are. You can place her in Memory Care if need be, and if your health is compromised to the point where you can no longer be a good caregiver. We humans can only do what we are capable of doing and when we can do no more, that is when we raise the white flag of surrender, agreeing to let paid help do the rest.