Primary, neurologist, and neuropsyhologist have all said that he should not live alone and that he needs help. His worsening dementia is likely Alzheimer's, according to neuropsychologist. His MRI last fall was normal for his age. He also gets agitated and was referred to a geriatric psychiatrist but his insurance doesn't cover any of those in our area. Besides, this visit would result in medication, which I think would not work because he can not deal with all the ones he is supposed to take already. He cannot keep straight, even with specific directions typed out, what is what and when and how to take them. He showed me putting eye drops in his mouth and putting the tablespoon of fiber powder on his tongue. He can not follow written directions on anything. He tried to add gas from lawn mower gas can into his car, which we had filled up 2 days ago. He somehow had scrambled eggs and coffee in his cup, but didn't know how that happened, after I told him what it looked like. He was hesitant to discard it but didn't want it either. His house has termites and silverfish but he doesn't want to spend the money on treatment because he "could die next week." He refuses any in-home care, much less leaving his home before he dies
Do I really have to wait until he lands in the hospital to get him into memory care? I suppose I am enabling him for doing so many things for him, but I don't have the heart to not help him.
And it often takes a crisis, hospital trip and then a move directly to a care facility.
Your description matches that of my folks about 3 years ago. This is gonna be a rough ride. Get as prepared as possible before the S hits the fan and it will, trust me. My folks were the king and queen of stubborn. I Finally got them in care but what a rodeo that was.
Time for you to go shopping for dad's next residence. And I would not waste time doing that unless you are able and willing to become his caregiver. But, he needs help, one way or the other, now.
Seeing doc's is now so easy even if not in your area. Telemed works great and has a much greater choice of doc's because you do not have to limit providers by their proximity to you.
You will find that home care is very expensive, start about $10,000.00 a month and up depending on your location. You may just have to do the planning for the move without input from dad. This will take a great deal of strength on your part.