Follow
Share

Since the pandemic I've been worried about taking my mom to her doctors appointments. I started trying to spread them out and pay attention to the most important ones. She has soooo many issues I'm not sure I can deal with it all.
Her eye doctor found Muscular Degeneration and she needed an injection in her right eye. She'll have to go once a month now.
Her Neurologist found out her spine has serious problems but surgery is out of the question due to her age (She's had two back surgery's). She has to have spinal injections done asap. The spine issues are causing severe nerve damage. Numbness in her hands and her right leg has 95% nerve damage causing her foot to drop.
Knees too! One knee is turning in because she didn't want knee surgery years ago. Also, she has AFib.
Today was her mammogram appointment. She has had cancer in her right breast (2005) and was worried about that. Now!!! They found abnormal tissues in her left breast and she has to go for a biopsy on Friday.
I am worried about keeping up with all of this and taking care of myself and my family. I feel like I need to start planning to get help. Transportation for one! What if she has to get treated for this breast issue and needs to go daily for treatments? Am I jumping the gun? I don't want to be naive and have things fall apart without knowing what to do. My mom is 87 years old!
Any advice will help. She does have an option for veterans benefits and I've been holding off until she felt or I saw she needed it. Should I start the ball rolling?
She gets up at 5:00am every morning and gets herself ready for the day. She is in the kitchen at 8:30am every day. Her breakfast is always waiting for her. I fix her meals, wash her clothes and set them out for her each day. I take care of her meds, schedule doctors appointments and keep her bathroom and room clean. Suggestions Please!!

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Find Care & Housing
Whew! That's a lot of medical management. I can't speak to what the Vets can offer her, but I'd offload as much of the housecleaning, laundry, grocery shopping and cooking as possible since you really need to accommodate her to her medical appointments. She shouldn't be going to those alone or with a paid caregiver (except if she does need the daily cancer treatments, then maybe a pd caregiver with a medical qualification can take her). These services should be paid for by your mom if she can afford it. Also, I'm hoping she has an Advance Care Directive (aka Living Will) due to the number of serious issues she has. If not, she should speak to each of her doctors (in a Zoom call) so they can give her insights and guidance so she can create very specific instructions that reflect her values and concept of quality of life. As I'm writing this I'm hearing on the news that more mandated covid lockdowns may be imminent, so not sure how this will impact her care. I wish you much wisdom and success in figuring out a strategy.
Helpful Answer (1)
Report

Definitely start the ball rolling. Sadly, the issues will only get more intense and harder to deal with, and you clearly need the help. I was able to hire a wonderful helper for my dad despite his resistance. She quickly became invaluable and a true friend to him. I hope you’ll be able to find similar. The key for me was in being very honest about what we needed and his expectations. I wrote out a list of everything I could think of that he needed help with and a description of his personality. It was a big help in finding the right person. I wish you the best in finding well deserved rest and help
Helpful Answer (3)
Report
Eunice1210 Nov 2020
Thank you so much!
(1)
Report
Get going with the Veterans Benefits as soon as you can. The VA sometimes works s...l...o...w...l...y The nice thing is once things are in motion you will receive what ever you/she are/is entitled to retroactively.
Helpful Answer (0)
Report

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter