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Where is the best place to start pulling the string in starting to look for assistance with my 80-yo mother and 88-yo dad. They make just above Medicaid limit, have no savings and have lived with me (only surviving child and working full-time) for 5-6 years. She fell and broke her hip in late Feb. Dad is barely mobile. I’ve always been active, but can’t leave the house now to go somewhere for a day or two.

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When you say "assistance", what do mean? Aids to come in for hands-on help? Or financial assistance?

Are you the PoA for either parent? Is anyone their PoA? Need answers to these questions so you can get the best guidance.

Your Mom may now be a candidate for LTC, which is what Medicaid pays for in most states (plus their SS benefit). A doctor needs to assess them as needing LTC. Maybe your Dad would qualify, too. Talk to their docs. Then I would consult with a Medicaid consultant for your state, to strategize how they can financially qualify.
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ToniCh May 12, 2023
Thanks for the input. I do not yet have POA. Does LTC mean nursing home cuz we’ve not had that conversation 😬😬. I’m not even sure what I/we need, a case manager would be nice..
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Welcome, Toni.

Have you contacted the local Area Agency on Aging? It's generally the best place to start.

Heres the link:
https://aging.nm.gov/services/senior-services/area-agency-on-aging-aaa

You want to ask them for a "needs assessment " for your parents. This will give you an indication of how much assistance they need with what tasks. You can also ask for a case manager to be assigned.

Having the "I can't do this anymore" conversation is quite literally the hardest thing I've ever done. But being honest with my mother about what I could and couldn't do vis a vis her caregiving needs was a necessary step in getting her what she needed to keep her safe (and employed).
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