Loved one in memory care at a cost of $12,000 a month. Now I have topay for 12 hours of private duty on top of that. $55 an hour. I thought I was putting her in this facility because they had staff totake care of her. They had her snowed on Haldol and when I requested that be stopped it was either drugs or we pay for private duty. She can be agressive but is easily distracted. We will be bankrupt trying to pay for all this
Will they never get a scheduled break? Lunch?
Will they never call in sick?
At any of those times, your loved one may hurt another resident or caregiver. At which time, your loved one could be asked to leave. (I would raise heck if it were MY mother who was hurt. $60,000 a year to be injured? I might be calling the police.)
Please reconsider your decision to not appropriately medicate someone who clearly needs it.
I would speak now with the MD, asking transfer to hospital at the best and SNF at the least. I would ask that different drugs and drug cocktails be tried in an effort to find some medium between completely "snowed" and agitated.
I won't know what to say to you really other than this, finally. We I this loved one I would pray to god (unbeliever that I am) that I was snowed to oblivion. What really is the sense to living in this condition? It is torture. It is torment. It is a Hades on earth. And I cannot imagine how it can be allowed, nor what it would be to stand witness to it over time. I spent my life as an RN. There's no one I can imagine who would not rather be dead that go through this. Would you wish to?
I am so very sorry.
You can get a geriatric consultation for your loved one, but realize medication is the most reasonable outcome here. Why would you want her (or him) to feel so agitated in the first place??? Dementia is a horrible lose-lose situation for ALL involved, but most of all for the sufferer. Please don't make it worse than it already is! And save $55 an hour in the process.
Good luck to you.
$55/hour sounds to me like a deterrent. They don’t really want to do this. Maybe you could get a better price if you hire your own private duty minder, if the facility would be okay with it.
You should not be paying for her care in any capacity.