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I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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I'm 55 now, I had a stroke at age 30, after the stroke I could not control my tears, tears of joy, saddness ect. I would cry at the drop of a hat for no reason, it took 3 or 4 years to get over it, I still occassionaly get over emotional about something insignificant. This is probably your dad's problem, I hope I helped. Jan
Not knowing anything about your Dad's history, physical or otherwise, i personally would have no idea why this could be happening, or even what to suggest. Is it possible to give more information?
You might also want to check his medications. My mother has hydrocephalus and some of the neurological medications they gave her over the past few years have made her really moody - mostly toward the sad side. I now know to look out for those sudden changes and let the doctor know the medication isn't working out. At one point she was waking upin the middle of the night sobbing and she really didn't know why.
I have a friend who sheds a few tears whenever he laughs or gets very nervous, and he's been like that since his late-30's. (He's now in his mid-50's.) A few years after we became friends, I asked him about it, and he said that it has to do with his blood pressure, for which he has been taking medication since before I met him. You may want to check your father's blood pressure or have a physician check it if for no other reason than to rule it out.
If I were in constant pain and felt so helpless and hopeless all the time I'd be depressed too. He's trying to be strong and preserve the image of the man he used to be by hanging on to what's left of his dignity, so of course he'll deny it. He doesn't want to be a burden to anyone.
Imagine yourself in his shoes. How would you feel? Would you dare show it and risk others treat you like a feeble old man/woman?
I am sorry to read this as it saddens me. Sometimes I pick up my Mom from Daycare and she is SO happy! Other times she is sitting and crying. Her neurologist said its depression. Some mornings she is escatically happy and sometimes she wont get out of bed. This makes for a difficult morning when I work. Anyone else go thru this? She had 2 cerebrel hemmorage strokes in Nov of 09. Upping her antidepressand dosage really helped a lot! She is mostly happy now but not always. Today I picked her up and she was crying and doesnt know why either, or cant explain it. The Daycare had an Elvis Impersonater there and she was happy and danced they told me. I know her and she loves music so I am sure it was true. At least today, I realized that her crying was from feeling overwhelmed and sitting alone, TOO much stimulation maybe? Regardless, we hugged long, and kissed and she talked a bit crazyy and comfused so I kept saying to her , "Mom, I took care of it all, I did everything and you have nothing to worry about." Just telling her I took care of it (whatever she is thinking) and that we are going "home" for supper. She always says "really?!!" Music in the car also helps. If it happens at home I say "listen Mom, you dont have anything to worry about because I DO ALL the worrying for everyone" She says "really?" I think of it as a person being blind and inside themselves they are all confused. I think lots of TOUCHING, HUGS, and REASSURANCE helps. Touch means so much at this stage I think. It kills me when she asks for her husband or that she is going home to her "mother." As the Alzheimer's group told me, I agree with everything and do a lot of lying to keep her happy because she forgets in 10 minutes anyway. "oh ya, you can go to your mothers in a minute." then she forgets but it keeps her calm at the time. At night I sing her to sleep and use her name in the songs, sometimes she laughs. I make up songs how we are here because of her and how much we all love her. I was told that when you sing to them, they listen with a different part of their brain and understand it better, it seems to !! She can sing better than she can talk. When I tell her "I am staying here all night, so you are safe and I am right across the hall," she said "oh thats so nice, thank you." It seems to make her feel safe. I hate the crying episodes , its interesting to read it could be from the strokes. Hugs to everyone out there caring in their homes, living it is so difficult with practically no nights or weekends off day in and day out, month in and month out, and year in and year out. We get out sometimes but it take a lot of planning.
I actually read this thread looking for answers and I realized I have the answer and wasted my time here. Older people cry more, especially after heart surgery or in their 60's because we realize our mortality. When we see young love, sunsets, puppies etc, we realize these experiences to us are no longer infinite. We are in the rhelm of goodbyes and making peace with everything dear to us keeps creeping up in our psyche..
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Sorry!!
Hap
If I were in constant pain and felt so helpless and hopeless all the time I'd be depressed too. He's trying to be strong and preserve the image of the man he used to be by hanging on to what's left of his dignity, so of course he'll deny it. He doesn't want to be a burden to anyone.
Imagine yourself in his shoes. How would you feel? Would you dare show it and risk others treat you like a feeble old man/woman?
-- ED
She had 2 cerebrel hemmorage strokes in Nov of 09. Upping her antidepressand dosage really helped a lot! She is mostly happy now but not always.
Today I picked her up and she was crying and doesnt know why either, or cant explain it. The Daycare had an Elvis Impersonater there and she was happy and danced they told me. I know her and she loves music so I am sure it was true. At least today, I realized that her crying was from feeling overwhelmed and sitting alone, TOO much stimulation maybe? Regardless, we hugged long, and kissed and she talked a bit crazyy and comfused so I kept saying to her , "Mom, I took care of it all, I did everything and you have nothing to worry about." Just telling her I took care of it (whatever she is thinking) and that we are going "home" for supper. She always says "really?!!" Music in the car also helps. If it happens at home I say "listen Mom, you dont have anything to worry about because I DO ALL the worrying for everyone" She says "really?" I think of it as a person being blind and inside themselves they are all confused. I think lots of TOUCHING, HUGS, and REASSURANCE helps. Touch means so much at this stage I think. It kills me when she asks for her husband or that she is going home to her "mother." As the Alzheimer's group told me, I agree with everything and do a lot of lying to keep her happy because she forgets in 10 minutes anyway. "oh ya, you can go to your mothers in a minute." then she forgets but it keeps her calm at the time. At night I sing her to sleep and use her name in the songs, sometimes she laughs. I make up songs how we are here because of her and how much we all love her. I was told that when you sing to them, they listen with a different part of their brain and understand it better, it seems to !! She can sing better than she can talk. When I tell her "I am staying here all night, so you are safe and I am right across the hall," she said "oh thats so nice, thank you." It seems to make her feel safe. I hate the crying episodes , its interesting to read it could be from the strokes. Hugs to everyone out there caring in their homes, living it is so difficult with practically no nights or weekends off day in and day out, month in and month out, and year in and year out. We get out sometimes but it take a lot of planning.
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