My mom is in memory care due to being at this level of dementia and she is the only one who can walk on her own. Everyone else is in wheelchairs, a lot older, and a lot weaker physically and mentally. She is sociable and there is only one other person there that can talk out of 48 people. I feel like she is a "fish out of water". But, mom is not able to take care of her financial/medical affairs, she is incontinent and needs someone to wipe/change her and put on her briefs/diapers, needs to be bathed, has fallen twice, would not be able to take her meds on her own, and would need assistance in all of these things along with finding her room.
I was wondering if she would be able to be in assisted living because there are so many more things they can do and the facilities are nicer. It's depressing for me to see mom who is ambulatory and social in the memory care setting. I feel like she is having less quality of life in memory care and is going to deteriorate faster due to being in such a restrictive environment. Are there any assisted living who would take someone like my mom or am I out of luck?
I have a friend who thought her mom might need the memory care unit for a bit more supervision during the day but decided to just up her level of care in regular assisted living so that she gets multiple wellness checks each day and an attendant to help get her to meals. I don't know if there is actually any cost differential but it was more pleasant for her mother to not have to move and to stay with her tablemates at dinner.
If it's not one thing, it's another. At this age, and in this condition, NOTHING is perfect, and that's really the bottom line, isn't it?
Best of luck!
Another issue is that ALF for the most part try to have people capable of some level of appropriate socializing. If the ALF has too many people in regular care who are very needy then the residents who are able to function are sometimes upset, feeling they are there to "give care" to their more needy neighbor, to seek help for them.
So it absolutely depends on how the facility works and I would start to look in your area and have your list of questions at the ready. Where my bro is currently there is really no one who can do changing and etc. for incontinent patients. There is assistence with medication by a medication nurse if that is needed, but people are expected to be able to get themselves out of their own rooms and into the dining hall for meals and etc.
Wishing you good luck in your search. It's so hard to find ideal in this journey.