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I am the full time caregiver for my husband who has AD. He is very social and enjoys talking to other guys. I am looking for time to run errands and he needs social interaction not just someone babysitting him. He does go to day care one or two days a week, but gets tired after three hours but won't rest there. Some agencies say most clients don't want male aides so they don't hire many.

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igloo572, no, but I do appreciate your trying to see it from another point of view. No, his cry was fearful and that simply would not do.

I think it's rather easy for us nowadays to not only accept, but embrace, those who are homosexual. I certainly don't have any qualms about that...but:

a. We need to take into consideration those we care for and THEIR thoughts/beliefs. In retrospect, I think it wigged my grandfather out. Back in his day, homosexuals could be arrested.

b. I've learned from that episode that I was perhaps a little too accepting. As in, I wanted to think that even though the care taker was homosexual, that he'd never harm my grandfather. What I have learned is that....black/white, heterosexual/homosexual...there are good and bad people in this world and I just have to be more mindful of that rather than be politically correct.
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When I worked as a case manager in state home care, we sometomes needed male caregivers. to assist our male clients. Sometimes it is hard to fund a male HHA as it is a female dominated profession. Most males are not inclined to be direct care givers, but those that are available are usually very caring.
Male care givers are often the best solution to assist male clients with ADL's and socialization. They are also good with aggressive mentally challenged people( male or female)
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When daddy was bedridden mother had aides coming in 3-4 times a week. Most of them were male. I don't know if that was just random assigning, or because dad was a big man and a woman (even a very strong one would have had trouble moving him). These guys were all just fabulous with dad. One thing--the pay was not great, most of them were doing aide work as they were going to nursing school. Come to think of it, all of them were going to school, and working FT or PT as aides.
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It is very easy. You can search in online for any caregiving services. search for the best caregivers.I hope you will must find some solutions.
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Where do you live? You are talking to the wrong agencies. Having been in nursing, I know there are males who do aide work, you just have to find someone who is willing to come to your house. If you still get resistance, put your own ad in the paper, do a background check, and try some different males out until you find a good fit for your husband. My husband didn't like daycare because of the routines, and really the same things they did. They screwed up his dinner schedule too with snacks, and my husband wouldn't eat dinner, and lost some weight. At 118 lbs. he cannot afford to lose anymore weight. Good luck with finding someone (try Dept. of Economic Security work division).
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Most nurses are still female as are aides. The pay for aides is not nearly as lucrative as nursing. I have twins who are both RN's. They have a BS in nursing from the University of Florida. They work with few males and many of those are from the military. Some go back to the military which says much about nursing.

What my girls see is both male and females can do nursing however, the males have an edge with the ability to do the physical part of work. Nursing is physical. Both of my girls have had Injuries making them seek other or better working situations.

I wish more men would go into nursing. They are smart, strong and compassionate. Nursing needs them.
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I am in the process of finding companionship for my husband, who has early AD. I also prefer a male companion, who I feel would easier for my husband to relate to. My situation is complicated as at this point I do not need someone on a regular basis. It is very difficult. However, I just kept searching the various home care agencies in my area and think I have located two (out of about 10) that say they have male caregivers available. You have to look very hard and not necessarily at the most prominently advertized agencies. Check them all out, even the smaller ones. They are out there, it just takes a lot of time and thorough searching to find them.
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Try your state home care through local AAA(Area Agency on Aging) State home care contracts with many different home health agencies. This will save you background checks and can help find a suitable match for your relative's needs.
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My dads first CG was male.. and they did fine. However, he quit the agency just as mom moved in from rehab.. and our current gal is working out fine.. maybe if they have some of the same intersts? Of course, after almost 2 years he still cant remember her from day to day.. it's always a new adventure for him!
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In Tucson, we found male caregivers from two agencies who were very good with my Dad. He ended up with a private female CG in the end, but that worked out well because she enjoyed knitting and crocheting and so did my dad, so she knew how to befriend him, by asking to see his work and then asking him for advice on techniques etc. Best buddies after that! If your husband is a veteran, you might try the veterans groups for someone just to come visit with him on a volunteer basis too. Or call your council on aging or the AD association in your town to see if they have any male volunteers at either place.
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